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speechless

February 24, 2011

Aside from the usual stomach ache from my many allergies/intolerances, I don’t get sick that often. But I think I ate something yesterday that didn’t quite agree with me and right now I look and feel like I have the chicken pox.

I still managed to function normally though…I dragged myself out of bed to make Maya’s breakfast. I packed her lunchbox. I dropped her off to school. I did some work. I picked Maya up. I shivered in the cold during a two-hour park playdate (I hate that word). I asked Ali about his day. I responded appropriately and with interest. Some real. Some feigned. I made dinner. I cleaned up the kitchen. I gave Maya a bath. We finished her homework.

And then, only then, did I collapse on the sofa with a blanket and an episode of “Selling New York.”

“I don’t want to upset you,” Ali said, “but it’s a total downer when you’re sick.”

Ummmm, what?

As you can imagine, I wanted to know exactly what Ali meant by his comment. I wanted to tell him that my day was business as usual despite feeling crappy. I wanted to delineate the 15 things I’d accomplished (without complaint I might add). I wanted to compare and contrast his sick day with mine. But the truth is that for the first time in my life….I was speechless. 

You must be thinking...Ameena must have a lot of time on her hands. Rest assured, this chart took me less than 5 minutes.

But that was yesterday. Today my “chicken pox” is on the mend and my smart ass reflex has kicked back in.

In other words, it’s business as usual.

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73 Comments leave one →
  1. February 24, 2011 12:30 am

    I’m glad you’re better! Now you can go cheer up your poor husband! 😉

  2. Leslie permalink
    February 24, 2011 12:45 am

    Alas, typical male behavior from time immemorial. Mrs. Genghis Khan probably had to take over all the marauding and country overrunning when Mr. Genghis Khan had a cold.

    On a happier front, Selling New York is such a guilty pleasure! California homes always feels so spacious in comparison.

  3. Leslie permalink
    February 24, 2011 12:46 am

    Wow, I’m an oblivious snufflepuss, aren’t I? I dearly hope you’re feeling better my dear!!!

  4. February 24, 2011 1:12 am

    haha classic

  5. February 24, 2011 1:12 am

    and hope you are feeling better now …. 😀

  6. February 24, 2011 3:34 am

    Wow! Husbands always know just the right things to say. Even if you couldn’t muster up the strength for a comeback I hope you at least gave him a look.

    I love Selling New York too. You know that way I am ready for when we can afford to buy our New York house.

    Happy that you are feeling better!

  7. February 24, 2011 3:47 am

    oh goodness, what a comment. Hope your comeback was good! Feel better soon. I hate feeling that way too.
    😦

  8. February 24, 2011 3:59 am

    No, it wasn’t the best thing in the world he could have said, but it shows that he loves your smart-assed self and misses it when you can’t zing. I think it’s pretty cool, actually.

  9. February 24, 2011 4:34 am

    Lol…I love the chart.

  10. February 24, 2011 4:36 am

    Business as usual…., looking forward to hearing some cool little quippy comebacks to that one Ameena. I’m gambling on the fact you’ve got some pearlers ready for poor unsuspecting (not) Ali after that comment 😉

  11. February 24, 2011 5:28 am

    You weren’t kidding… you really do love excel. 😉

    I hope whatever it was you ate is soon out of your system. You need to get that sass back! 🙂

  12. February 24, 2011 5:59 am

    All this tells you is that he’s happiest when your smart-ass quotient is highest. Personally, I think you’ve just been given license to say exactly what you think, all the time. After all, his happiness is all that matters.

  13. February 24, 2011 6:25 am

    Ali! Big slap across the face to him for that comment. That chart is priceless!

  14. February 24, 2011 6:30 am

    Bummer about the pox, but I am glad to hear that it didn’t last long!

    And I love your graph! 🙂

  15. February 24, 2011 6:31 am

    Are you not glad that in a way he agreed/made it clear he needs your energy to function fully ?

    Hope you get well soon so two of you will feel better.

  16. February 24, 2011 6:39 am

    I hope you feel better soon. 🙂

    It’s amazing what I can accomplish when I’m sick; when my husband gets sick he’s on the couch for days and acts like a baby.

  17. February 24, 2011 6:45 am

    Glad you’re feeling better. Too bad your husband has no idea how much you can still accomplish when you’re sick. Does he read your blog at all? 🙂

  18. February 24, 2011 6:49 am

    “I responded appropriately and with interest. Some real. Some feigned”

    I want to remember that quote for a long time – too funny. You are sweet – I do that when I am well.

  19. February 24, 2011 6:56 am

    I am convinced there really is no such thing as a sick day for moms. Just doesn’t happen, but when a man is sick somehow the world HAS to stop revolving so we can all fuss over him. Glad you got your smart ass back.

  20. February 24, 2011 7:39 am

    I probably would have been speechless too at first until I fully processed it and looked for the hidden meaning. I would have decided to take what he said as a compliment.

    It could really only mean he secretly loves your normal (subjective, i know) self and retorts. He saw how boring life is without his sassy wife. Now go give him a good lashing and make his day. 🙂

    Glad you’re feeling better. Sounds like you were miserable!

  21. February 24, 2011 8:04 am

    glad you are feeling better! nice chart, haha.

  22. February 24, 2011 8:18 am

    Life is so much harder when you are sick. I hope you feel better so you can stop being a total downer to Ali!

  23. February 24, 2011 8:46 am

    aww hope you feel better! In one ear and out the other!

    I am finally getting over a cough I’ve had for 6 wks, because I had to move to the frigid North for my husb, and developed cold-weather reactive asthma! Every time, I would cough especially at night, he would get sooo annoyed and that would piss me off to no end. Rather than feeling sorry he would roll his eyes! HAHA some men! 😉

    Ali probably wants you to be back to your normal self and couldn’t find the right words to say it! 🙂

  24. February 24, 2011 9:28 am

    Glad you are feeling better! What an awful long day that must have felt like. I dont think I ccould have managed to do 1/2 those things.

  25. February 24, 2011 9:40 am

    Oh dear, I’m glad you’re feeling better. Isn’t it “funny” (not really, I just couldn’t find a better word) that when the hubby is sick, his whole life comes to a halt and the 2 important jobs he helps you out with gets delayed? While when we’re sick, the kids still get taken care of, laundry is done, house is cleaned, mouths are fed, and on and on. Work those reflexes, girl ;-). Hope you’re back to 100% soon.

  26. February 24, 2011 9:56 am

    I would have been speechless analyzing the different meanings that one sentence could hold. Obviously my mind can’t shut things off or let things go! 🙂

    Feel better!

  27. February 24, 2011 10:14 am

    What got me thinking when I just read this post was – wow, Ali adores Ameena for who she really is, smart-ass comments and all. I don’t know many couples where either partner can say that. Glad you’re feeling better.

    And can I just say that you blog never ever fails to make my laugh out loud, or make me think about love and relationships and marriage and life. I wouldn’t call myself ‘wise’ from any angle which is why I think minor setbacks make me immensely broody and annoyingly introspective. Your blog gives me perspective. Thank you for doing such a fantastic job blogging here.

    • February 24, 2011 12:48 pm

      I put up with a lot but Ali puts up with a lot too – I’m no piece of cake I suppose. 🙂 Thank you for your kind words – this is once of the nicest comments I’ve ever received!

  28. February 24, 2011 10:29 am

    Well, the problem is – this happens with me and really amazes me how HE can say that. But then he would instantly give me an example of when I did similar thing. Not that I stop at that. But!

  29. February 24, 2011 11:14 am

    Men must not know what they’re like when they’re sick.

  30. sana permalink
    February 24, 2011 11:25 am

    what a very useful chart!! i should make some and post around the house to convey my sentiments

  31. February 24, 2011 11:42 am

    Hah, that just means he misses the snarky comments when you’re sick. Glad to know you’re back in good (and snarky) spirits! 🙂

  32. February 24, 2011 11:56 am

    Haha love the chart – Glad you are feeling back to normal today!
    I also hate the word playdate – when other girls mothers ask me that at ballet i always pretend like i didnt hear them haha

  33. February 24, 2011 1:10 pm

    When I become a wife and mother one day (far far away), your blog is what I am going to use to stay sane…LOVE IT!!!

  34. February 24, 2011 2:37 pm

    HA! what a man response 🙂 glad you’re feeling better. it was so cold yesterday i wore my down coat.

  35. February 24, 2011 3:33 pm

    haha….love the chart.:) so funny too, when men get sick they turn into big wusses, when women get sick it’s business as usual. not fair to say the least.

  36. February 24, 2011 4:01 pm

    hahahah! i think you should go and make up for all those missed smart ass remarks 🙂

  37. Kath (My Funny Little Life) permalink
    February 24, 2011 4:05 pm

    “[…] I asked Ali about his day. I responded appropriately and with interest. Some real. Some feigned. I made dinner. […]”

    This is totally hilarious. I especially love how you say that you responded with interest, as if interest wasn’t something that comes naturally but has to be put with effort into your response.

    Your smart ass comeback chart is gorgeous. Given the fact that you apparently weren’t well when you wrote that post, you’re so witty you should never be able to! 😉 I hope you’ll feel well again soon!

  38. February 24, 2011 4:20 pm

    Losing the ability to come back with a smart ass comment would be one of the worst things ever! You poor thing, so glad you’re on the mend!

  39. February 24, 2011 7:02 pm

    I snorted when I read Ali’s line about you being downer. When I’m sick, Marcus always tries to force me to sleep because he perceives that to be The Only Path To Wellness (since I’ve known him, he’s never been sick).

    Men.

  40. February 24, 2011 7:42 pm

    Happy late birthday Ameena! I hope it was a lovely birthday week. I hope you feel better soon. 🙂

    • February 26, 2011 9:35 am

      Thank you Bonnie! It’s nice to hear from you…I hope you are doing well?

  41. February 24, 2011 7:48 pm

    And you made a chart…brilliant 😉

  42. February 24, 2011 8:19 pm

    I’ve been sick the past 2 days as well, but there is still work to be done. There must be another word for playdate, I don’t like it all that much either. Glad to hear you’re up and at em’ again, sassy remarks and all.

  43. February 25, 2011 4:03 am

    As my mom says when I complain about my husband “there’s only one mother in the family.” No sick days for mom. I hope you’re feeling better. Chart is awesome.

  44. February 25, 2011 4:25 am

    Ha! That’s definitely one of those, “foot in mouth” or Hubby didn’t think before he spoke moments.

  45. February 25, 2011 6:36 am

    Its about time because I am not sure if I can handle you without your comments.

  46. February 25, 2011 2:20 pm

    isn’t it funny when the hubby’s are sick the world is about to end and when we are sick, it is an inconvenience to them?! I will never understand!

  47. February 25, 2011 2:51 pm

    I m wondering at the fact that how could you do so many chores even when you were sick.And made a chart too–way to go girl 🙂
    My hubster becomes too caring when I m sick and that sickens[read irritates] me all the more.ALAS !
    Have a nice weekend!!

  48. Cindy permalink
    February 25, 2011 3:18 pm

    your smart ass reflex is the BEST and I laugh so hard!
    xoxooxxo

    Chicken pox??? Really?

    that STINKS.

    get better my friend.

  49. February 25, 2011 3:19 pm

    haha! i love that you made a chart. how fantastic! i’m so glad you’re feeling better and are up for dishing out the sassy again. 🙂 and thank you for your sweet comment. it sounds like you can really understand what i go through with my ocd. it’s so hard isn’t it?! but we find ways to live life, and i think you show that really well on your blog. i love how real it is, something i think we could use more of in blogland. so thank you!

  50. February 25, 2011 3:33 pm

    Love the chart! Glad your feeling better and I hope you have a great weekend 🙂

  51. February 25, 2011 5:24 pm

    girlfriend i know exactly what you mean…sometimes i know that when i want any sort of validation for the million things i do every day, i have to call a woman. i never expect that kind of acknowledgment from my husband…i think i’d even go to my dogs before i went to him…

  52. February 25, 2011 5:44 pm

    And that is a fabulous reflex to have! Pregnancy has kind of turned mine into mean ass mama instead. But this hopefully is temporary. And luckily usually reserved for adults that piss me off not the kids! 🙂 Glad you are feeling better.

  53. February 25, 2011 5:47 pm

    I am always amazed at what we do when we are sick. I guess we could lay in bed and complain like “them”. 🙂

  54. February 25, 2011 6:11 pm

    HILARIOUS chart 😀 😀

  55. February 25, 2011 6:45 pm

    Ameena, you are so cute! That chart is an exact representation of how I get when I’m sick too! I’m so glad you stopped by my blog today and left me that sweet comment. It’s wonderful to “meet” you. Hope you have a fantastic weekend!

  56. February 25, 2011 10:18 pm

    He’ll be sorry when you’re 100% all better! =)

  57. February 26, 2011 7:57 am

    Maybe he meant it in the best way? Like he isn’t inspired by your warm, sunny, cheery personality? Because you’re under-the-weather, you can’t liven up his life?

  58. February 26, 2011 8:37 am

    Hmm, wonder what this illness was! Least its on the mend.

  59. February 26, 2011 9:46 pm

    It seems like everyone has been on the outs with some kind of sickness. I hope you are feeling back to normal, my dear. And men are not the best caretakers (or the best patients, for that matter!) So I feel your pain there 🙂 Thanks for sharing, sweet woman. I hope you have a restful Sunday full of love and laughter!

  60. February 26, 2011 10:16 pm

    My husband is the WORST when I am sick. He’s the kind of person that thinks my coughing is more annoying to him than it is to me. It’s not like he says anything. He just winces and moves a little farther way. AND THEN he is the biggest baby when he gets sick. But I love him. Really I do.

  61. February 27, 2011 6:01 am

    I love the graph!

  62. February 27, 2011 8:10 am

    Infuriating, aren’t husbands? Lol! Anyway, I’m glad you’re feeling better, Ameena!

  63. February 27, 2011 8:14 am

    Haha I love your wellness quotient chart! I’m impressed that it only took you 5 minutes… I would have been creating that thing for at least 15 minutes…

  64. February 27, 2011 2:18 pm

    You and Ali are just priceless.

    You need your own sitcom! 🙂

    Do you work from home or out of an office? Full-time hours? How is the book coming along? Are you writing it first or doing a proposal?…sorry, this stuff obviously fascinates me as I am longing…

    Hope your feeling better! I recommend hot cocoa curled up on the couch watching The Oscars (just to see what they’re wearing 🙂 ).

  65. February 27, 2011 3:43 pm

    The graph is just one of the reasons I love reading your blog 😀

  66. Janelle permalink
    February 28, 2011 3:55 am

    If only men had the slightest clue how pathetic they are when sick…

  67. February 28, 2011 9:56 pm

    Snufflepuss….I just love your verve. Even when sick, you shine.

  68. March 2, 2011 8:33 am

    Ooh, Ali likes it when you’re spunky;-) Oh, and you can tell Ali that I said there’s nothing worse than a man who complains-that’s just not virile (smile but seriously). Cauldron Boy does that too over the smallest things. Yeah, not cute…
    Hope you’re feeling better, Ameena…:-)

  69. March 3, 2011 6:14 pm

    HAHAHAHAHHAAHAHA. Don’t you hate it when our “men” make our illnesses about THEM. When I have cramps monthly Glenn goes “Can you sleep on the couch, your groans are waking me up”…WTF!!!

  70. nadia khan permalink
    March 5, 2011 12:45 pm

    LOve your chart…you rock!! ali cracks me up…love it!

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