she said she said
There was an incident at school. Suffice to say it was a “Girl X said that Girl Y said that Maya said that Girl X was…” sort of incident.
Now maybe I’m completely biased but I know this allegation is 100% false because:
- I’ve ingrained in Maya that we never, ever comment on anybody’s appearance.
- Maya is a people pleaser and never says bad things about anyone.
- One has to wonder, how trustworthy a third-party 6-year-old’s word can be?
I tried to put myself in the other parent’s shoes. If I thought a kid was calling Maya names would I be upset? Sure. Would I send a number of emails to her mother that accuse her daughter of being a bully? Definitely not.
In any case, let’s just look at reality here, for a second, shall we? Even though I know Maya didn’t make the comment, the truth is that in general, kids are going to say things. Horrible mean things. It’s inevitable. And the fact is that many girls seemed to be wired to be jealous, bitter creatures who say terrible things out of spite.
Back during my “fun” days of high school I remember a few of the popular girls calling me everything from “Conan the Barbarian” to a “stick figure.” That’s what happens when you’re an underweight, 5’8” girl with frizzy hair.
Did my mom rush off to consult the teacher? The principal? A therapist? No. Did she send an email (or back then a telegram) telling the other parent that her kid was a bully and needed to be punished? Of course not. Why? Because my mom had no energy to intervene in such things and it never occurred to me to talk to her about them.
My Ugg-clad kid doesn't have a mean bone in her whole body. Thank God she didn't take after me.
Maybe I just come from the school of hard knocks but coddling our kids, fighting their battles, and trying to make every single thing okay for them might not be the answer if we want them to be able to hold up the in the real world.
But then again, maybe I’m so messed up that I have no idea what I’m talking about? Who knows.
burns
My name is Ameena…and I can’t stop burning my forehead with the curling iron.
I hope this huge close up of my sun-damaged, burned face doesn't scare you away...
Ali thinks this is hysterically funny. And I can’t blame him…I mean, what kind of idiot can’t keep a hot tool from touching her skin? If the shoe was on the other foot I’m sure that I’d be pointing fingers and laughing my a$$ off too.
What exactly is my problem? Well I have no coordination for starters. Plus I’m always in a rush when I’m battling my hair.
And in addition to being clumsy and in a rush, I’m usually testing Maya on her spelling words, telling Ali his clothes don’t match, and/or trying to read a book at the same time.
Anyway, last week after The Incident, I dusted off my Laura Mercier
So apparently I’m not just hopeless with the curling iron but with makeup too?
gifts
A moment of silence please…because my husband just gave me the best gift I’ve received from him in our 11 years of marriage.
Okay so maybe I received it 3 weeks after my birthday…and maybe it wasn’t wrapped in anything special. But I’m willing to overlook that because my husband put some serious effort into this gift. Unlike:
- The jacket he bought me as a birthday gift from Maya. I guess the statement “I really want the short, white jacket I saw in Armani Exchange” can easily be confused with “Please get me the first jacket you see when you walk into Armani Exchange – even if it’s black and too big.”
- The diamond heart pendant Ali bought me for Mother’s Day a few years ago. Not sure what part of, “Please don’t EVER buy me jewelry. I really do NOT want jewelry” is unclear?
- The gold-plated rose Ali gave me for our first Valentine’s Day. Enough said.
I know you’re thinking I’m a mean and ungrateful bitch. And I’m not disagreeing with you.
But you kind of know what I mean, don’t you? I don’t want my husband to buy me stuff simply because he thinks he has to buy me stuff. Because the great thing about getting older is that you finally have the luxury of buying things for yourself. So if something isn’t meaningful then it isn’t…meaningful.
Insightful, yes?
Anyway, I’m thrilled that Ali identified my favorite Betjeman and Barton tea from Paris and then had it shipped to our house. This? This is meaningful. Because we all know I’m way too lazy and cheap to do this for myself.
I’m off now to enjoy a cup of tea. And to rethink my opinion of American Express’ Concierge Service. Because it appears that for once they actually did something right.
While I'm not going to win Mother/Wife of the Year Award anytime soon, I haven't killed anyone yet or shot myself in the head. And that, my friends, is how I calculate success these days. 
FANCY THAT FANCY THIS 