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May 15, 2012

You know those days when you wake up thinking you’ve not only got it all under control but you’re doing a stellar job in the process? Yeah. Mother’s Day was not that day for me.

I’ll spare you the details but let’s just say that in addition to being on the same page as Absolutely No One, I was also in serious pain from a root canal I had on Friday. Add to that the fact that I had no choice but to pay $20 to valet park for my root canal and you can imagine my state of mind.

Anyway, when Mother’s Day dawned all I really wanted to do was to wallow in my misery. But then there as Maya hovering about my pillow and brimming with excitement. So I put on my robe and a happy face and headed to the living room where an array of Maya-made gifts and cards greeted me.

From card number 3 I learned that I have “good pachints” and I make “good choices.” I am “helpfull” and “kind.” Apparently I also make good “dersts.”

As I read I had to wonder: how could she possibly think these nice things of me? I mean, does Maya not know that:

  • a pachint mother wouldn’t roll her eyes when her child refused to acknowledge that John had 2 apples left after he ate 5 of the 7 in his flipping basket?
  • a loveable mom doesn’t tell her daughter “to stop sitting on my head and move to the other couch?”
  • my regular dinner offering of “pasta bake” is more half-ass assembly of fat and sodium laden ingredients than “nice food?” 

I don’t know the answers to any of these questions. But what’s clear is this: My child thinks a lot of me. And therefore, I Must Try Harder.

92 Comments leave one →
  1. May 15, 2012 12:23 am

    Belated mother’s day wishes to you Ameena. Those gifts that Maya made for you are so cute. To tell you the truth even I wonder how can Purvi say ” I love you amma” when only minutes back I would have raised my voice at her. Guess that is why they are called children. So innocent and unconditional

    • May 15, 2012 2:15 pm

      Unconditional is exactly right…and from one guilty-feeling mom to another, a belated Happy Mother’s Day to you as well!

  2. May 15, 2012 12:36 am

    Oh how sweet!!!!!! I miss having small kids- now that they are older they remind me how many mistakes I made when they were growing up…but then they say, “But you were the best mom ever”….and I’m thinking, “Oh RIGHT!” ha ha!!

    Hope you get to feeling better after that root canal- I hate teeth work!

    • May 15, 2012 2:15 pm

      I’m sure you were/are the best mom! I have no doubt about others’ abilities…it’s my own that I question endlessly!

  3. elijah permalink
    May 15, 2012 12:56 am

    Don’t you think all of your pain would have gone away the moment you have seen these sweet,heartfelt cards with many titles and cute doodles:)….
    Have a speedy recovery dear and I ,myself have to go through root canal in coming Sunday…Already dreadful:(

    • May 15, 2012 2:16 pm

      Oh Elijah…my thoughts are with you! This root canal thing? It’s freaking killing me.

  4. May 15, 2012 2:42 am

    Adorable! Obviously, Maya sees the “real” you!!

  5. May 15, 2012 2:50 am

    You are too hard on yourself Ameena! Your root canal or those emails are still bothering you. I know it is hard, but believe me they are not worth beating yourself up over.I realise now that some people are just plain jealous of the easy relationships we share with our spouses and kids. I am like you and i did all those things you mention. My daughter and the way she handles her kids (she isn’t always sweet and soppy with them either) is proof that I did something right. Maya is going to be fine. Now go, splurge on an expensive pair of shoes 🙂

    • May 15, 2012 2:17 pm

      I hope that I can say the same things about Maya when she’s grown up. 🙂 Thank you Madhu…so glad to have your comments to make me feel better!

  6. May 15, 2012 3:25 am

    Happy belated Mother’s Day….
    Maya made really adorable stuff for you… My boys kissed me and when I asked for my card n all they said ” it is hard work but I love you mommy”….
    Hope you are feeling better now!!

    • May 15, 2012 2:18 pm

      “It is hard work?” How funny. Did their dad help them write the card?

      Thanks for the kind words. I had part 3 of the root canal today and let’s just say that I’ve felt better!

  7. May 15, 2012 4:38 am

    But all you need to be is good enough friend. There is no perfect mother out there. She loves you dearly and she wouldn’t have said those things if they weren’t true 🙂

    • May 15, 2012 2:19 pm

      Not sure if I even manage to get to “good enough.” But your comment is much appreciated Kimberly!

  8. May 15, 2012 4:48 am

    That is adorable. Hope you’re feeling better. A root canal paired with a $20 valet is enough to make the most pachint mommy want to wallow in misery. I got a card from my littlest guy a couple years ago that said, “Dear Mommy, I love you even though sometimes you are mean”. Hahahahahaha

    • May 15, 2012 2:20 pm

      Love the honesty! I’m sure that Maya won’t be able to help herself one of these years.

      Thanks for the comment Heather…and a happy belated Mother’s Day!

  9. May 15, 2012 5:32 am

    Love it! Maya not only thinks a lot of you…she thinks the world of you! Happy (belated) Mother’s Day to you!

    • May 15, 2012 2:20 pm

      Thank you Parita! I hope you had a great day with your mom as well.

  10. May 15, 2012 7:21 am

    Happy Mothers Day, Ameena. You are clearly an awesome mom and deserve all these adorable gifts.

    PS It took me a minute longer than it should have to figure out what pachints was.

    • May 15, 2012 2:21 pm

      You aren’t the only one! I was mystified for a minute when I read Maya’s card…

  11. May 15, 2012 7:45 am

    Dont be so hard on yourself Ameena!!! I am sure you have lot more pachints than you think and you are one great mom! Maya is adorable

    • May 15, 2012 2:21 pm

      Thank you Dixyya…for your kind words and for the compliments!

  12. May 15, 2012 8:36 am

    The kid knows you love her! You feed her, clothe her and care for her. You are her mama! Hope that root canal feels better. I’ve heard horror stories about them.

    • May 15, 2012 2:22 pm

      I’m living the horror story right now! Massive pain…

  13. May 15, 2012 8:40 am

    Hah, pasta bake is also the default dinner in our house. And that’s with a food blog! So it’s clear you not only make good dersts but also great meals 🙂 Happy Mother’s Day friend!

    • May 15, 2012 2:22 pm

      I highly doubt you’ve ever made a pasta bake. Or if you have I bet it was with homemade pasta and ricotta. 🙂

  14. May 15, 2012 9:10 am

    It took me a while to figure out what pachints meant. It’s clearly going to be a long day.
    And trust me, considering the food I was raised on and the minimal-at-best parenting I grew up with, you’re Super Mom. You know, even if Maya is spoiled, you complain a lot, being a mother isn’t that remarkable, and medication is needed. 😛 (That’s going down as one of my favorite Ameena posts.)
    Happy (late) Mother’s Day to you!

    • May 15, 2012 2:23 pm

      Jenna…you turned out amazingly sweet and kind so your mom did something right!

      But thank you for always making me feel better. I hope you had a great Mother’s Day with your mom as well!

  15. May 15, 2012 9:44 am

    awww maya! melts even my childless heart lol. happy belated mother’s day to you and hope you are recovering well! i never had a root canal but i heard they are pretty painful 😦

    • May 15, 2012 2:24 pm

      Painful is right…I’m still recovering…I fear the recovery might never end! LOL

      Thanks my friend. I appreciate the kind words.

  16. tandra permalink
    May 15, 2012 11:25 am

    How lovely is that, Hope you had a great Mother’s day…Love Maya’s handwriting, very neat…My little boy also made some cute stuff and in his message he wrote he loves me as I cook great food…And I asked him is the first thought that comes to your mind when you think of me? And of course he says YES…LOL…so much for having a foodie kid :-)…I need to raise my bars too !!!

    • May 15, 2012 2:25 pm

      It sounds like your bars are right where they should be. I bet you are a great mom!

      Thanks for the comment and a Happy Belated Mother’s Day to you as well Tandra.

  17. May 15, 2012 11:26 am

    Well Mothers Day can bring out the best in children. Now we at least know which words Maya needs to practice spelling. And the stupid dentist should be paying YOU for parking. What a crook!

    • May 15, 2012 2:25 pm

      It drives me crazy that in this city doctors seem to get away with making their patients pay for parking. I wonder if it’s like this everywhere? Drives me nuts.

  18. May 15, 2012 12:57 pm

    You’re brimming with loveliness under that crusty funny exterior. Only a child can see it.

    Oh wait, what does that say about me?

    • May 15, 2012 2:27 pm

      I don’t know about brimming with loveliness but I will admit to a crusty exterior. 🙂 And you have no sign of crustiness Jennie! That I know for sure.

  19. May 15, 2012 1:17 pm

    I should have given my mom a similar card on Mother’s Day. Although, that level of creativity with my vocabulary at the age of 27 would have probably raised more concerns about her rearing of me than anything. 😉 Maya is a sweetheart!

    • May 15, 2012 2:28 pm

      Yes, a card like Maya’s from you might have raised some red flags! LOL.

      Hope you had a good Mother’s Day with your mom Megan!

  20. May 15, 2012 2:14 pm

    Aw! Go, Maya! Did you get a delicious dinner out of the day?

  21. May 15, 2012 3:13 pm

    Aww!! That is so sweet – your child is flipping adorable.
    And btw – I have no doubt that you’re a kick ass mother.

  22. May 15, 2012 3:49 pm

    At first, I just read the title and reread more times than I want to admit trying to pronounce it. LOL.

    Happy belated mother’s day, friend!!! You are a great mom. Maya is proof of that. And I would love a pasta bake any day! 🙂

    • May 17, 2012 6:58 pm

      Happy Belated Mother’s Day to you too! I know that you too are a fantastic mother. 🙂

  23. May 15, 2012 4:34 pm

    Maya is such an honest & sweet! And she got everything right! Happy belated Mother’s day!
    How’s the root canal? I had mine few years ago. Not as bad as I expected but once is enough! No more!

    • May 17, 2012 6:58 pm

      The root canal is getting better…slowly. Once is definitely enough! Too bad this is my second one…

  24. May 15, 2012 4:53 pm

    Love your title for this post! It had me guessing at first. It’s perfect!!!! Happy Belated Mother’s Day to you!

    • May 17, 2012 6:59 pm

      Thank you Rufina! Maya’s card had me guessing too…

  25. May 15, 2012 5:23 pm

    Oh I am so sorry about the root canal! That is my life fear.

    What great mama’s day gifts! You do a lot for your family and you are a great mother – you deserve the love!

    • May 17, 2012 6:59 pm

      Thank you my friend! You are super generous with the compliments…I appreciate it. 🙂

  26. May 15, 2012 6:43 pm

    Oh hell to the yes.

    Ameena, I know that you dream of the day when Maya can spell, but I for one am going to be extremely sad when she can. In all seriousness, these moments make me laugh so hard that I am moved to tears.

    God bless you and your pachints.

  27. May 15, 2012 8:31 pm

    –I soooo much dig your authentic, honest voice ❤ xxx

  28. May 15, 2012 8:52 pm

    Happy Belated Mother’s Day! See, you are a good mom! Kids are so honest and innocent, and you just have to believe you are doing a good job. She’s such a good kid. Hope your mouth gets better. 🙂

    • May 17, 2012 7:03 pm

      Thanks Nisha…you are always so insightful. I love it!

  29. May 15, 2012 11:15 pm

    Happy belated Mother’s Day, Ameena! Maya is absolutely adorable, and that’s purely down to her upbringing…which makes you a fantastic mother :)! You deserve all those presents- motherhood ain’t easy but you seem to be doing a mighty fine job!

    • May 17, 2012 7:03 pm

      Khushboo…you are so kind. Thank you for all the compliments!

  30. Deeps @ Naughty Curry permalink
    May 16, 2012 2:27 am

    aww that is so ultra sweet of maya! love all the gifts she made ur indeed one lucky mom 🙂

  31. May 16, 2012 3:17 am

    Nothing better than the words when they’re learning to spell. My favorite was “dersts”, do you really make good ones? Maybe their teachers plant card ideas in their heads, my son said “you are nice” in his card. I’m not sure who he was referring to but nobody has ever called me nice.

    • May 17, 2012 7:04 pm

      I don’t really make good “dersts” or anything actually. Poor Maya just doesn’t know any better.

  32. May 16, 2012 12:27 pm

    oh my god. after about 15 minutes of trying different combination and pronunciation and re-reading the post again i think i finally figured out what ‘pachints’ meant.
    gosh, i love your daughter ❤ 😀

    feel better now after the root canal stuff? i haven't ever done, can't imagine the pain.

    • May 17, 2012 7:05 pm

      15 minutes? Love the honesty. 🙂

      The root canal is better. But I hope that you don’t have to endure one!!

  33. May 16, 2012 1:08 pm

    Kids are so forgiving thank goodness. My kids spoiled me with the cutest cards and like you it makes me want to be better.

    • May 17, 2012 7:05 pm

      I’m sure you are already “better.” I just know…

  34. Sam @ Mom At The Barre permalink
    May 16, 2012 6:58 pm

    Having seen you in action, I can affirm that you are a very ‘pashint’ mom! Hope you had a lovely mother’s day!

    • May 17, 2012 7:06 pm

      Thanks Sam! I hope you also had a great Mother’s Day and that Z gave you a cute card.

  35. May 16, 2012 8:14 pm

    This is so so so sweet! I love that age when they are learning to spell… it’s just so cute. I helped some kids make mothers day cards that day and my heart was continually touched by what kids loved about their mothers…. my favorite quote was, “Mom, you make me feel speshell.” The little girl asked if I thought her mom would like it and my heart nearly leapt out of my chest as I smiled and said, “Oh, yes, I think she’s gonna love it.” So cute.

    Anyway, what I have seen about kids and parents is that you have to make some pretty big mistakes to lose your kids faith. It sounds like you are a fun mom and Maya is grateful for the wonderfulness you bring to her life.

    Have a great day,

    • May 17, 2012 7:10 pm

      “Speshell.” I love it. Seriously, I will miss some of these words!

      And thank you Currie for your comment…so thoughtful. I appreciate it.

  36. May 16, 2012 10:10 pm

    Oh Ameena, you sweet woman. You are wonderful and your daughter sees and knows it. I love it. I feel the same way, always need to try harder. Parenting is so interesting the more I do it. This was such a touching post. Take care,


    PS. Next time I am down your way I am going to call you-I just love you!


    • May 17, 2012 7:11 pm

      I hope you DO call me! I would love to meet with you Shauna.

  37. May 17, 2012 12:10 am

    Ok, generally I fancy myself the brainy sort, and maybe it’s that I don’t have kids but for the life of me I can’t figure out what pachints means…would you decode it for a simpleton like me?

  38. May 17, 2012 9:01 am

    I have no patience for math, either. And my kids are now in algebra which I haven’t failed in over 25 years. Still, I’m an English teacher so I give myself a pass on all things numerical.
    (I excel at offering myself passes.)

    Anyway, I love that your daughter included “words” on your card because I have plenty of those. But I’m quite certain they’re not always “meaning full.”

    Ah, well. Can’t win ’em all.

    p.s. I came here via the lovely Lady Jennie on her recommendation. Nice to meet you. You seem nice. And Pasta Bake is delicious.

    • May 17, 2012 7:13 pm

      I love that you excel at offering yourself passes…I think that I’m doing quite well in this arena as well. 🙂

      You seem nice as well…thank you for the thoughtful comment! And for reading. I appreciate it.

  39. May 17, 2012 11:57 am

    Simply adorable!

  40. anywherethereisanairport permalink
    May 17, 2012 5:32 pm

    Pachints (I hope I spelled that right) has NEVER, ever, been one of my virtues. Here is one of my favorite quotes:

    “Why is “patience” a virtue? Why can’t “hurry the f@#^ up” be a virtue?

    And a very happy mother’s day to you! :))

    • May 17, 2012 7:14 pm

      I’m so with you on the revised quote!! I have few virtues and pachints is definitely NOT one of them.

  41. May 17, 2012 6:19 pm

    So sweet 🙂
    Kids are so forgiving…it’s kind of amazing!
    Hope your toof is feeling better. Know the feeling unfortunately.


    • May 17, 2012 7:14 pm

      Are you a root canal survivor as well? Massive. Pain.

  42. May 18, 2012 3:11 am

    such a sweet post!! for mothers day, my mom took us out for gyro. the irony. lol

    • May 18, 2012 3:12 am

      but then we did take her to the spa the next day! l’insitut sothy’s

      • May 18, 2012 8:11 am

        Oh the spa…what an amazing gift!

  43. May 27, 2012 4:51 am

    this is so cute! Hope you had a great mother’s day and you’re recovered from the root canal!

  44. Gayatri permalink
    June 6, 2012 4:14 pm

    This is so cute. Maya is just adorable. I remember making similar cards for my mom and buying her presents that she would never use. But she was happy that I tried (I think).

    By the way My pregnant friend’s husband surprised her with a Mother’s Day trip to Banff. Why are all the good men married to other women?

    • June 8, 2012 8:45 am

      Banff? I’ve always wanted to visit…I hear it is gorgeous!

  45. July 5, 2012 10:58 am

    Someone did say pachints is a bitter tree that bears sweet fruit 😛 Such a wonderfully sweet card and an even nicer post. And you know something? I did my elementary schooling in America, and ‘sounding-out’ words beats learning them by rote any day. I spelled turtle as trtl. My folks still have that activity book!!

    • July 5, 2012 2:44 pm

      TRTL…too cute. I’m going to have to ask Maya to spell it for me to see what she comes up with.

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