my husband is too honest
I was initially planning to write about my serious lapse in judgement when I stupidly agreed to go out to dinner on Friday night.
I was going to go into great detail about how Ali spent the evening on the iPad/iPhone doing work, while I spent the majority of dinner in the bathroom with Maya who thought she might throw up from eating too much ice cream. “Any minute Mama. Any minute.”
But I’ll spare you. And myself. And instead, I’ll give you an example of how politely asking how your husband’s day went can go so horribly wrong:
Me: “How was work today?”
Ali: “I wasn’t sure if I was up to going to work today because I was feeling sick. And then the traffic was really bad. But then I stopped at Starbucks and…Okay, I’m just going to tell you.”
Me: “Tell me what?”
Ali: “Well there was this really pretty girl in line. She was a nurse, in her whole nurse’s uniform.”
Me: “Her whole uniform? As opposed to half her uniform?”
Ali: “Yes. Like scrubs or something. Anyway, everyone was giving her attention. Everyone! Even this one guy who was very clearly married with a kid.
Me: “But not you, right? I’m sure you looked away.”
Ali: “Exactly. I decided not to give her any attention…mostly because I didn’t want her to think she deserved it.”
Me: “So what you’re telling me then is that you wanted to give a pretty girl attention but you didn’t. And it wasn’t because you are married and have a child, but rather because you didn’t want to feed her ego?”
Ali: “Yes.”
I guess the takeaway here is that it’s good I’m not a jealous person?
While I'm not going to win Mother/Wife of the Year Award anytime soon, I haven't killed anyone yet or shot myself in the head. And that, my friends, is how I calculate success these days. 
FANCY THAT FANCY THIS 
Meh, I think she deserved the attention. Nurse don’t get enough of it. Doctors, on the other hand, like to hog attention.
I agree!
I totally agree with this!
I totally agree too!
My husband will show attention and show me the person when i am with him. I used to get worked up within the first six months of marriage, but not anymore. I realised he’s too introverted and not jealous anymore. Now i point out girls, and ask if they are pretty. 90% of the time he won’t like them.. and will tell me i have bad taste 😀
Hilarious!
that sounds like my husband too 🙂
99% of the time Ali will think someone is totally attractive and I won’t. Or vice versa. It’s interesting that we’re married since we don’t seem to find the same people attractive?
haha thats ali for you… amazing levels of honesty.
Amazing is right. Or stupid levels of honesty? Depends how you look at it? 🙂
Either ways he was honest. that’s a good thing, right? My hubby never discusses such things with me. If I ask him what he thinks of a certain actress or a lady we happened to cross at the mall, his steady reply has been, ” she’s okay!” . Wonder if that means anything?
It means he’s super considerate! You are a lucky lady. 🙂
Well its better to be Honest .. dont you think
I don’t know…I waffle back and forth on this one…
Gotta appreciate the man’s honesty? I have to ask- does Ali have a manbag…or do you have to carry around his iPad for him??
I would never let him carry around a man bag! The iPad fits in my bag luckily. Or else he puts it in his laptop bag.
That’s hysterical! I’m curious though, Why she was getting the attention? Are people at Starbucks not used to seeing a nurse, or someone dressed to do her job? Was she exceptionally pretty? Did they need medical attention? I think these are all questions that will never be answered, but I needed to ask none the less. 😉
I’m going to assume she was exceptionally pretty. And I would love to see what these Starbucks patrons consider exceptionally pretty!
That is AWESOME.
Is it ok to admit I’ve gone out of my way to ignore/avoid guys who clearly know they’re “the shit” and are cocky about it? I like to think I’m bringing them down a notch. I doubt it works. But it makes me feel better.
Actually, you make a valid point. I will totally ignore guys who think they are “the shit.” That kind of ego drives me crazy.
Be careful, the lady may have been a con artist, gaining attention then conning them of all their wealth and sense.
Maybe she was a pickpocket in disguise?
Maybe she was going to a fancy dress party?
Sigh. Men. What can one do!
But you know what one man I know tells me when I find him ‘checking out’ women?
“Don’t expect me to lose interest in women. The first one I lose it in will be you.”
Me: Roll of the eyes.
they really should learn to look away.
This man sounds like quite a catch! Not that I should be judging I guess…
Too funny!
One could also argue that the subtext of Ali’s statement is that even though he notices good looks, they aren’t a deal-maker to him.
Very good point! Score one for Ali!
Oh dear. I love your response. I’d have just stared blankly wondering the heck to say about that.
I’m usually staring blankly too…I think I just had a good comeback day. 🙂
men are so annoying.. i’m not “that” jealous either, but it would annoy me, my response would most likely be, uhmm.. i can do that. omg, you need to throw out his ipad.. no gadgets during dinner except for checking in. 🙂
If I threw out the iPad Ali would divorce me. This I am certain of.
Gotta love that honesty! I think it’s a testament to how strong your marriage is. 🙂
Or it’s a testament to Ali’s lack of a filter?
I love his honesty! I have moments of jealousy, but then usually think “Well if it was a good looking doctor?”…
If it was a good looking doctor I would look…but I wouldn’t share that with my husband!
Ha! That’s a gem I haven’t heard from a man before. Gotta appreciate his honesty 🙂
A “gem” is right!
Ha! I wonder why he brought up the whole nurse’s uniform…Was that what initially got his attention or that she was pretty regardless of the uniform? Oh, well. Who cares!
I agree. The uniform portion of this conversation made the least sense.
I would have just said nothing and blinked many, many times.
I try to do this. But sometimes my big mouth can’t keep shut.
Hahaha… That woman must be wearing some kind of a (naughty) nurse outfit because why would everyone give her attention right?
I thought about this but it wasn’t Halloween? So I’m not sure…
Why were they all giving her attention?! she had to be wearing something other than (less than?) scrubs. haha.
Apparently she was just THAT stunning…
I love this!!!! I’m laughing sooo hard right now.
Thanks Anjuli! 🙂
That’s so funny. I love it how he just straight up told you like it is. Ali and his i pad. My hubby wouldn’t dare bring his in a restaurant.
The iPad/laptop knows no bounds. They go everywhere with us!
that’s awesome. I’m literally laughing.
Whatever works, right?
Whatever works.
lol! i have a no ‘electronic toys’ at the table rule enforced when we go out. it makes me an angry wifey. i’m needy i guess. you know, after all just craving a normal conversation over dinner sans surfing the interwebz. i had a stomach like your daughter’s growing up, i puked on everyone and everything. i must have had so many fans!
Please tell me you grew out of the vomiting. Please?
yes 🙂 but i still get wicked motion sickness!
If it’s any consolation, my husband is the same way. He can’t lie…it’s in his blood or something.
Oh Ali can lie…but just not about things that might be remotely offensive to me…
I think Ali needs some lessons in…..well…..something. That made me laugh out loud. We also don’t have any kind of electronics allowed when we’re out and about. Even Dudette has to leave her DS at home unless we’re on a road trip to visit family and it’ll take more than an hour.
Apparently Dudette threw up last night while sitting on the toilet. I had a meeting and so was gone (thank goodness). Hubby fed her junk food for dinner. We’re thinking that smelling her own poop is what put her over the edge. I’m just glad I wasn’t around. He deserved to be the one to clean it up since he fed her poorly.
You’re a good mamma for being in there while Maya was waiting for the chuck to up. 🙂
I’m feeling a bit on the sick side myself…after reading this.
Why do kids vomit so much? Why?
“Her whole uniform? As opposed to half her uniform?” ha! You never fail to crack me up, Ameena!
Thanks Liz. 🙂
Ah, baby puke. Something to look forward to. You are such a champ for dealing with it so valiantly. And I agree, jealousy takes too much time and effort. I’d rather spend my free time in more productive ways (i.e. eating) 🙂
Here’s hoping your little one isn’t a barf-machine like mine. Fingers crossed…
eheheh. Ameena. Ali is so funny!!
Funny…or maybe just out of his mind?
LOL. honesty is the best policy after all….
Depends on the situation and who you ask… 🙂
My husband would strike up a conversation with anyone, he is a total people person, pretty or not. I am not jealous at all and I love how outgoing he is. Ali’s cute in that he didn’t want to give her any attention. Exactly for what? Being born pretty?
When you put it that way…I see things in a whole new light! Well said.
There are men who need to learn that there are thoughts you keep to your bloody self. Your husband is one of those men.
Like I said…he has no filter!
Brilliant.
I am smiling in Minnesota.
…..because men are such
(((( Dumb Asses!!!!!!!!!! )))))
xx
Glad I could make you smile in Minnesota. 🙂
Well at least he told you about it…that should count for quite a bit! Thanks for sharing, sweet girl. Hope you are having a fabulous week!
That’s one way to look at it. 🙂
OMG, I would love to go out for dinner with you two. Hilariousness would ensue 🙂
Probably not…because Ali would be on his iPad and I’d be in the bathroom with Maya trying to clean her up. 🙂
Ha! Not many would confess to such incidence 😉 Should I think you are lucky?
I’m going to go out on a limb here and say no! 🙂
Hmmm, there is honesty, and then there is un-necessary honesty. Still I’d take either type over a liar…
I’d rather have either of a liar too. I think?
LOL… Ameena, I love ur writing….
B/W it is an old saying girl, MEN can never change….
Thank you Reem!
I’m confused (easily confused) did the Starbucks nurse incident make Ali want to go to work? Have some fun Ameena, I dare you to get a full nurses uniform (the white one not the scrubs) and show up wearing it.
The thing with my husband’s thought process? Ideas, even in the same sentence, are often unrelated. So I can’t answer that question.
Or maybe I’m easily confused as well?
i would much rather prefer such honesty. i dnt know what to make of my husband who doesnt seem easily impressed, even if the woman was drop dead gorgeous… after hours of pestering hel say ‘she was ok i guess’. either im a very lucky wife whose husband has eyes only for her (doubtful) or hes way too intelligent to get into a double edged argument! 😀
I’m sure he only has eyes for you! 🙂
We try to only comment on attractiveness of celebrities. That way we know it could never happen and our feelings don’t get hurt. Plus exactly how was I supposed to sit through “Drive” and not make at least ONE comment about how sexual Ryan Gosling is?
Did you see Blue Valentine? He did NOT look attractive in that movie – although I know he wasn’t supposed to!
yes, how did they make him look so hideous? It’s seems like such an impossible feat!
hahaha your husband is awesome. That may just be the best comment ever.
I’m sure he thinks so…
All I know is that I’m not surprised by the picture at all. He’s worse than I am.
I haven’t formed a real opinion on the Starbucks story just yet. I thought it was humorous, but at the same time I think you and Maya deserved a little more credit in his reasoning for avoiding the nurse. Because I admire your family, I’m withholding Ali judgment. 😛
No need to withhold Ali judgment…I judge him constantly. 🙂
I don’t know if I could handle the honesty, but it’s funny that’s what was going through Ali’s mind. That would probably elicit a death glare from me 😉
I’m actually really scared to get more than a glimpse into Ali’s mind. It’s got to be a scary place.
You are who you are….full of strengths and weaknesses, and if you were jealous, you would do it right…..80% of the time
🙂
I love when people are honest. It is an opportunity for me to be honest back
80% of the time? You give me a lot of credit!
Bad Ali. No dessert for him tonight. Sentence him to dishes for a week as punishment.
I could sentence him to do the dishes but I’d just be punishing myself. We both know I’d have to do them over again…
I’m assuming she wasn’t wearing pale blue baggy scrubs with puffy white shoes and a pale blue box shirt.
Maybe she was really one of those singing grams. For people ordering a nurse.
Good thing you’re not jealous.
A singing gram…interesting thought!
Ameena-I’ve tried commenting on your blog about three times now and wouldn’t you know it one of those six kids of mine distracts me!!!! 🙂
So, I’m dying as usual and so was my husband, I caught him reading this early the other morning.
First of all did you say to your husband, “Ali, have you seen how gorgeous I am?” I would have continued on to say, “we live in L.A., if you’ve seen one pretty girl-you’ve seen em’ all for Pete’s Sake! (Don’t you live in L.A.?)
And, I bet she’s right -above! I never thought about that…Hahahahahaha, a singing telegram….oh my.
Ameena-you’re great. Take care, looking forward to more.
Shauna
Your husband was reading? I wonder if he was on Ali’s side? 🙂
Thanks Shauna…you leave the nicest comments!!
Thank GOD it was scrubs so we know she was like a legit nurse. Next time I would remind Ali that anyone wearing scrubs is legitimately covered in pathogens.
Horrifying, right?
Next time you should really bring the iPad with you to the bathroom under the guise of WebMD while Maya pukes it out. And then start internet shopping. It’s not like you can do the puking for her.
I have to have my hands free when Maya is throwing up. Otherwise all of her hair? Covered. It’s not pretty. I’d sort of prefer pathogens in those situations.
i am a nurse and let me tell you something…
Know how much shit we touch/walk/see in a single half hour?
We are crawling with germs.
Definitely a mood killer.
I could never be a nurse. I don’t like to be in hospitals!!
Hilarious! It’s nice that he is honest.
I’m sure he’ll be happy to read this comment!
I totally feel your pain…my husband takes his iPad EVERY WHERE! He is in med school though, so he uses it to study…but when we are out somewhere he usually ends up playing a game or whatever on it and it drives me nuts.
I have to say that I never, ever see Ali playing games on the iPad. Unless it’s “Life” which he plays with Maya. And we all know that’s NO fun.
haha….your stories crack me up…and the best part is, with the images you put up, I always imagine you saying all these things with a straight face that makes it all the more funny:-)
So glad I could make you laugh Suruchi! 🙂
hmmm… Ameena let me tell you one thing its always great to read your post and i am sure its going to be helpful for me as i am getting married in near future ….I am learning alot from your behavior towards your hubby and wish i could be so composed and calm like you:).
Oh Saira…I fear that I am NOT a good role model for how to be a good wife. But if you are looking for honesty? Then you’re in the right place.
Congrats by the way!
I love how matter of fact he is about his ‘observations’. 🙂
Yeah…like we’re talking about the weather or something…
he got a point with the “look away from the ego girl”. I d do the same. cant tell u about the attractivity thing, because I dont know your husbands character. he shows honesty, though!
He definitely shows honesty… 🙂
Haha my fiance is like this! Exactly like this.
I’m so sorry Jennifer! You have my condolences… 🙂
Hilarious!
Sometimes you’re really funny or is Ali funny? I’m sure he was aware of what he was saying to you. Some guys enjoy winding their women up. I wouldnt have given a reaction or the satisfaction.
My other half used to do this and when I did it back it shut him right up. 😉
I suppose I should try doing it back to him? Maybe it would make the point??
oh it certainly would,, but you have to be very subtle about how you do it… 😛
Ameena tell the truth, the picture you forgot to put on the blog was the next one after the one you took here. The one your daughter took of YOU smacking him upside the head with his Ipad/Iphone for rudely doing work while he took his family out to dinner and also having that discussion about some chick at starbucks in front of Maya in the first place. NO manners some men I tell ya.
p.s. you dont need manners to deal with that yourself. 😉
I smack him upside the head often…it seems to make no difference! But I would love to have a photo of it. 🙂 Next time for sure.
You guys are too funny! Honesty is a great thing, but sometimes too honest…well 🙂
Who would have thought one’s husband could be too honest, right? 🙂
In my teens and 20s I was insanely jealous if my boyfriend looked at other women (?!!). In my 30s I started to realize that there’s nothing wrong with it, ‘but you still love me, right??’ In my 40s, Derek can look at any woman he pleases as long as drool doesn’t start dribbling down his face and he’s not a neanderthal about it. It doesn’t bother me at all. Oftentimes, I think random woman is much prettier than he does anyway. Appreciating strangers for their beauty doesn’t mean that your signif. other doesn’t love you. It just means that he has eyes that still work. 🙂
I’ve never been jealous of Ali looking at other girls. His cluelessness baffles me (or pisses me off, depending on my mood)!
To think that he brought the topic up by himself and honestly said what he thought … I find that so cute! 😀
There’s only this one time when my hubby said one of his colleagues is so pretty, looks like model (read hot) and sits on gym ball instead of chair at work. 😀
Apart from that, I think I’m the one who mostly tells him about or points out pretty girls 😛
A gym ball instead of a chair? I am so intrigued by this idea….I do fear that my co-workers will think I’m slightly crazy??
Intrigued me too. Really want to see her especially after knowing this, hehe.
And I guess the colleagues get used to it 😀
Hi! I know this is kinda off topic however , I’d figured I’d ask.
Would you be interested in trading links or maybe guest writing a blog article or vice-versa?
My website goes over a lot of the same topics as yours and I
believe we could greatly benefit from each other.
If you’re interested feel free to send me an e-mail.
I look forward to hearing from you! Great blog by the way!