I am not a jealous wife.
You would think this is a good quality, right? But the truth is that my ambivalence bothers my husband. He totally wants me wondering if the female voice on the other end of the phone is really just his virtual assistant.
Yes, I said virtual assistant.
Anyway, I guess I should be concerned that in this past week alone:
- I overheard Ali on the phone with American Express trying to find out why the flowers he ordered were not delivered. To a female I’ve never heard of. To an address I’ve never been to. On a date that means nothing to me.
- I found several photos of designer shoes and handbags on Ali’s iPhone. Dating back to November of last year. None of which I have received or anticipate receiving because my husband knows that I would never, ever let him drop $4,000 on a gift. For me or anyone else.
- My husband made unusual efforts with his wardrobe, even going so far as to break out the new purple sweater I bought him and match it nicely with a complementary purple striped shirt. All by himself. Remarkable indeed.
A part of me is curious. The other part of me is just wondering if “the other woman” is capable of cooking, is willing to field my husband’s texts, and is open to dropping off his dry cleaning.
Because if she is, I may just be prepared to look the other way…