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maybe?

January 20, 2012

It all started with a pair of pants.

More specifically, a pair of khaki pants that someone threw outside their closet last week and onto the floor of our bedroom. This was passive-aggressive code for: “It’s high time my wife visited the dry cleaner.”

Now normally I am on it. But I just haven’t had a whole lot of time lately, especially since I’m working more than ever. So the pants remained on the floor.

Then things were added to it. Lots of things. Sweaters, ties, shirts, and more pants (but not the orange sweater, in case you were wondering).

And the pile grew.

Eventually the pile was so large that I had to steer a couple of feet out of my way just to go from my closet to the bedroom hallway. But the pile remained.

Until finally, a whole 7 days later I picked up the huge pile and hauled it to the dry cleaners.

This was the pile...in better times.

So what’s so remarkable about a pile of dirty clothes you’re wondering? Well two things actually:

  1. I didn’t scream, yell, nag, or even address the pile with my husband. For 7 days. How’s that for impressive?
  2. I got a text that the dry cleaning was picked up. By Ali. And I didn’t even have to ask!

Maybe good things do happen to those who wait. Which means that maybe, after we’ve been married another 11 years, my husband will actually stop throwing his s@#$ on the floor and expect me to take care of it.

Maybe?

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102 Comments leave one →
  1. January 20, 2012 1:04 am

    HAHAHA Ameena, point number 2 is never going to happen! Men never change that way unless constantly policed and I don’t have the energy for that 🙂 My laundry basket is always crying for help and I ignore it as long as I can!

  2. January 20, 2012 1:09 am

    LOL!! Love it!!
    BTW: Does Ali read your blog??

    • January 20, 2012 3:12 pm

      He certainly does. He doesn’t learn anything from it but he reads it….

  3. January 20, 2012 1:45 am

    No Ameena I agree with Beetlebuggy, men NEVER change 🙂 🙂 though we may be become even more patient 🙂 🙂

    • January 20, 2012 3:13 pm

      I’m hoping to become more patient…especially if I have a long road ahead of me!

  4. January 20, 2012 2:06 am

    Well it seems as though there has been progress on both sides of the fence. No yelling from you – and actual initiative from Ali. It’s a day to celebrate. If only you the dry cleaner would lose the orange sweater… and the dishes would make their way into the dishwasher. Ahhh… we can’t have it all. 🙂

    • January 20, 2012 3:13 pm

      I can’t celebrate…I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. 🙂

  5. January 20, 2012 2:54 am

    wow he is the man, doesnot need asking he does it anyway 🙂

    • January 20, 2012 3:14 pm

      This was the first, and likely the last time it will happen – I’m sure!

  6. January 20, 2012 3:15 am

    Haha loving the tags on this post! But that is progress – I’m impressed! You should get Maya to loan Ali one of her gold stars or something.

    • January 20, 2012 3:14 pm

      So glad that people read my tags…I think they are the most interesting part of my post! 🙂

  7. January 20, 2012 4:28 am

    Did he pick up the dry cleaning to be nice or because he wanted/needed the clothes.

  8. January 20, 2012 5:08 am

    Ali’s method may have been a little passive, but at least he didn’t ask you to take his clothes to the dry cleaner while on sitting at his computer. AND he picked them up! Win win, my friend!

    • January 20, 2012 3:15 pm

      I guess when you have low expectations (like I now do) this would be considered a win-win!

  9. January 20, 2012 5:14 am

    First I think both Ali and you have secret resolutions this year, you are trying to be more patient (see point 1) and Ali being a more helpful husband (see point 2) . Clearly are y’all trying to out do each other? I’m impressed!!!!!

    • January 20, 2012 3:16 pm

      I’m sure there is no competition here…I will never be patient and Ali will never be helpful. 🙂

  10. January 20, 2012 5:43 am

    I can so appreciate this right now. Our pile was sitting on the kitchen counter, and although I vowed not to take it to the dry cleaners, I did because I can’t stand anything on my counters, but I’m refusing to pick it up. It was ready 5 days ago…you give me hope that CD’s pants will not remain at the cleaners for all eternity. 😉

    • January 20, 2012 3:16 pm

      Hope is all we have Heather. And really, I can’t stand anything on the counters either!

  11. January 20, 2012 6:10 am

    Sorry Ameena, I’m with Ali on this one. The fact that he put his cloths in a pile that ‘needed’ a clean indicates he just does not sit there watching TV, playing games or on this phone. He is a man (a married one too) who is aware of his surroundings.

    The fact that he picked the stuff up from the dry cleaners with any form of prompt from you, suggests either 1. His new year resolution was to make more effort around the house and with the married relationship, and/or 2. He loves you and realises you are having a hard time with everything at the moment.

    • January 20, 2012 8:35 pm

      My friend…you can obviously see the good in anyone. That’s a characteristic I need to develop! 🙂

  12. January 20, 2012 6:50 am

    Wow, you should win an award for not yelling at Ali! 7 days?? I would be pouting 🙂
    Well.. at least he picked them out from the dry cleaner without being told. There is hope!
    Have a great weekend! 🙂

  13. January 20, 2012 7:16 am

    Nope.
    After almost 9 years of marriage, it has yet to change.
    I blame my mullet wearing mother in law for doing everything for him. He expects that now.

  14. January 20, 2012 7:25 am

    Maybe he’ll change, but another 11 years is a long time to wait. You seem to be the one changing, I used to be extremely impatient too but with practice have got myself under control. When dealing with crazy people (my kids) I’ve had no choice.

    • January 20, 2012 8:37 pm

      I have my own crazy people to deal with so I can relate…

  15. January 20, 2012 7:53 am

    That’s very funny…I deal with the same thing. My problem is that Ralph has piles like that all over the house and thinks nothing of it. It’s his only flaw. 😉

  16. January 20, 2012 8:49 am

    I like it! Counter his passive-aggressive actions by making him wait! Everything eventually gets done without incident!

  17. January 20, 2012 9:49 am

    hahahaha I love this. Sometimes I wonder what men would do on their own. I mean, as the only girl at work, the crap I have to fix for them is incredible. Sometimes I’m amazed they even manage to make it here in the morning.

    • January 20, 2012 8:39 pm

      At a different job a few years ago I was the only female. I can relate!!

  18. January 20, 2012 9:56 am

    a responsible husband…thats all a lady needs

  19. January 20, 2012 9:58 am

    I would have held out. Eventually he would have run out of clothes and taken them there himself, or at the very least addressed you about the matter. I’m so thankful that Hubby does our laundry. 🙂

    • January 20, 2012 8:40 pm

      What? He does the laundry? I’m sort of speechless right now, and that doesn’t happen often.

  20. January 20, 2012 10:04 am

    You have great self-restraint! I would have thrown the pile into my bf’s face when he walked in the door…

  21. January 20, 2012 10:05 am

    There have been countless piles on our floors. I HATE it that he does that but I’ve been learning to cut back on the nag factor. There is a dry cleaning service at his work so if he can just remember to take his dirty stuff to work then he’s all good. What a good wife you are for being the dry cleaning service! And he showed his appreciation by picking it up. Maybe it will happen again someday.

    BTW-still sick! The cold won’t quit but I was able to sleep well with meds and thank goodness I’ll be off Friday. Have a good weekend.

    • January 20, 2012 8:41 pm

      They have a dry cleaning service at work? Now that’s a fabulous idea!!

      Feel better my friend…

  22. January 20, 2012 10:37 am

    Seems like an evenly balanced passive-aggressive equation to me. I wonder if this would apply well to my dating life…worth a shot, right?

    • January 20, 2012 8:41 pm

      It’s definitely worth a shot…although I don’t know if I’m qualified to give any type of relationship advice!

  23. January 20, 2012 10:38 am

    You crack me up. I told my sister in law that I have this dream where when I leave the kids with my husband I’ll come home to the house being put together, sparkling and beautiful just the way I would have it. That dream hasn’t quite come true yet. Oh well, such as life…Have a great weekend. Shauna

    • January 20, 2012 8:42 pm

      I’m just going to be straight with you Shauna…that dream will NEVER come true. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. 😦

  24. January 20, 2012 10:57 am

    I’ve very familiar with that pile. I decided to just buy another laundry basket so when the first one errupts, I can at least move the overflow into another one. Because doing my own laundry is enough, if he can’t keep up with his, at least keep it off the floor.

    • January 20, 2012 8:43 pm

      Oddly enough, Ali has more laundry than me too. I don’t get how that’s possible? But it is.

  25. January 20, 2012 11:22 am

    wow! now thats impressive. The not nagging, jk. But dare i say i am seeing progress in Ali?
    😉

  26. January 20, 2012 11:54 am

    7 days is patience my friend! I used to lose it when my brother would leave dirty dishes in the sink overnight!

    • January 20, 2012 8:44 pm

      Dirty dishes are the worst. I’d rather see laundry than dirty dishes!

  27. January 20, 2012 12:00 pm

    He went to the dry cleaners by himself!? I’m such a proud reader.
    Have a great weekend, friend. 🙂

  28. January 20, 2012 1:37 pm

    haha. I love your posts Ameena. When I check my blogroll, yours is the first blog I check to see if it’s new. I guess you’ve developed patience.. if his stuff is in my way, i pick it up and throw it on his side. Marriage is hard man!!!

    • January 20, 2012 8:45 pm

      I’m the first one you look at? I am so honored – really. Thank you my friend! And yes, marriage is HARD.

  29. January 20, 2012 2:20 pm

    i hate piles of sh*t on the floor!!! we are so the same about all this stuff.

    • January 20, 2012 8:45 pm

      Same situation? I am so sorry to hear that Daisy!

  30. January 20, 2012 2:45 pm

    Baby steps. I have learned that piles are just part of my reality. When they piss me off, I simply kick them under the bed where I can’t see them. Can’t find your shirt? Not my problem…next time put it in a laundry basket and it will be returned to you clean!

    • January 20, 2012 8:46 pm

      I’ve tried the out of sight, out of mind thing but it doesn’t work for me! Especially with dirty things….

  31. Leslie permalink
    January 20, 2012 3:24 pm

    Piles on the floor? Wow, I could not tolerate that. Dusty bunnies… well, I could grow a hutch of those I confess, but I’m too much of an expensive clothes hound to dis the threads by letting them hit the floor. What’s next? Ali blowing his nose into an Hermes scarf? (j/k Ali xo)

    • January 20, 2012 8:46 pm

      Ali wouldn’t know a Hermes scarf from a Kleenex. Sad, but true!

  32. willgoh2 permalink
    January 20, 2012 4:23 pm

    Wait.

    Dry cleaned khakis?

    !!!!?????!!!

    • January 20, 2012 8:47 pm

      Of course! Otherwise you can guess who’d be washing and ironing them.

      Yup. The dry cleaner it is….

  33. January 20, 2012 4:33 pm

    The fact that you succeeded at #1 means that you most definitely owe yourself a treat. Be it massage, copious amounts of sushi or a new bag. Right now my efforts are dedicated to making sure that the cutting board is put away. It’s a real journey.

    • January 20, 2012 8:48 pm

      A real journey is right. And now that you mention it, I need to go get sushi. And a massage!

  34. January 21, 2012 12:36 am

    The lesson from this is along the lines of absence makes the heart grow fonder:
    Lack of wearable clothes make the husband more helpful.
    That sounded more funny in my head.

    • January 21, 2012 8:48 pm

      I get it! So maybe if there was a lack of food and clean dishes he’d actually do more around here?

      • January 22, 2012 12:21 am

        Methinks its worth a shot:)

  35. January 21, 2012 7:00 am

    –Ameena,

    Ahhhhhhhhhhhh, Men.

    Don’t ya just love ‘um?

    xx

  36. January 21, 2012 1:28 pm

    Hahaha – I WAS wondering about the orange sweater, so thanks for throwing that in there 😉

    • January 21, 2012 8:49 pm

      No problem. Rest assured the orange sweater is still very much center stage!!

  37. January 21, 2012 8:37 pm

    You know, I’ll be honest. Ryan does some pretty great things for me. He does all my laundry. Can you believe it? I can’t. I almost am afraid that I’m going to jinx something by typing this. CRAZY LOVELY MAN.

    • January 21, 2012 8:49 pm

      I can’t believe it. Really, it’s too much to process.

  38. January 22, 2012 12:31 am

    I refuse to by clothing that needs to go to the cleaners. Too much of a hassle. My husband also thinks the bedroom floor is his dirty hamper. Most irritating. Didn’t their mothers teach them better?

    • January 24, 2012 8:20 am

      I think it’s an inherent quality…because every male I know is a total slob.

  39. January 22, 2012 12:57 am

    So funny, and seriously impressive that you went 7 days and didn’t complain or anything. Since we live on base and I pass by the dry cleaner every day on my way from the gym to the post office, dropping off the dry cleaning is no biggie for me. Then again, when we live in the real world again, I have a feeling it may be more of a drag. I’m lucky, Ryan doesn’t toss his stuff on the floor (maybe I should thank the military). They learn how to stay However, we do pile things up on the dresser during the week, and then put them away over the weekend. At least it’s not the floor.

    • January 24, 2012 8:20 am

      If I had a son I would send him to military school – this would ensure he knows how to pick up after himself!

  40. January 22, 2012 5:20 am

    I admire your patience. I would have thrown a fit. But now I have a housekeeper, so no worries!

    • January 24, 2012 8:21 am

      We have a fabulous housekeeper but she only comes once a week. The rest of the time I am picking up after everyone!

  41. Lady Jennie permalink
    January 22, 2012 1:28 pm

    I think that shows remarkable constraint.

    You are one dignified lady.

    • January 24, 2012 8:21 am

      Not sure I’ve ever heard anyone say that about me before… 🙂

  42. January 22, 2012 2:54 pm

    Even with so much policing, we tend to live our lives so miserably, they don’t change and live their life vicariously.

    It’s better to just ignore.

    • January 24, 2012 8:22 am

      I want to live vicariously too! It just doesn’t seem to be in my genetic makeup. (make up? not sure if that would be one word or two?)

  43. January 22, 2012 5:24 pm

    I can appreciate the text msg, but I don’t think he’ll ever stop throwing stuff on the floor. That’s either part of your genetic code or it’s not. At least, that’s what I tell myself when I’m picking Jonathan’s stuff up off the floor. *sigh*

    • January 24, 2012 8:22 am

      Genetic code! Exactly the word I was looking for in my previous reply.

  44. January 23, 2012 5:14 am

    I think the only way he’ll stop throwing things on the floor is if you refuse to pick them up EVER. But it depends on how high your tolerance level is for stepping around the pile of clothes.

    • January 24, 2012 8:23 am

      I’ve tried to stop picking things up but they just keep piling up!

  45. January 23, 2012 12:34 pm

    You are too funny Ameena, I would have ended up placing it on his laptop 🙂

  46. January 24, 2012 1:57 am

    haha, this reminded me of an ‘everybody loves raymond’ episode… 😀

    • January 24, 2012 8:23 am

      Funny…that used to be one of Ali’s favorite shows!

  47. January 24, 2012 8:58 pm

    Ummm throwing $#!% on the floor is never going to stop. Unless you place it all in his closet. I did that once. Worked for a week.

    • January 25, 2012 9:54 am

      Are you kidding? He wouldn’t care if his closet was overflowing!!

  48. Erika permalink
    January 28, 2012 5:16 am

    Your husband shouldn’t be setting this example for your daughter either she will do the same one day for you with her clothes and then God forbid the grandchildren one day in the future or she will think if she marries she will have to be her husbands slave. Ahhhhhhh Ameena do something quick.

    • January 30, 2012 8:43 am

      Agreed! He is setting a terrible example. 😦

  49. January 30, 2012 6:49 am

    so is this move a universal husband move? Cause I justttt picked up a few items from the floor…unfortunately I don’t need to haul them to the dry cleaners cause they are just REGULAR dirty clothes he left for me to do the laundry with. WTF.

    • February 1, 2012 2:17 pm

      Sorry to say it’s pretty universal. I hate to be the one to break it to you. Forgive me.

  50. February 2, 2012 9:59 pm

    I don’t know what’s worse, having clothes scattered everywhere (as in my home) or having one big pile of clothes. Either way, I think I lose. Argh. Some days I wonder why I even have a hamper.

    • February 3, 2012 10:36 am

      Exactly! It’s like, do they not see the hamper? The big giant white hamper? It’s mystifying.

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