If Betty White Can Do It…I Can Do It
For as long as I can remember I’ve wanted to write a book. And while I’ve written a couple of drafts in the past I haven’t been too inspired to pursue those projects because, well, they didn’t exactly knock my socks off. But thanks to this blog and all of your supportive comments I can say that I have finally found my “voice.”
I’ve been working on a new book project for a while now and the good news is that I think I am on to something with this one. In a nutshell, I am putting my sarcasm to good use to write a non-fiction, humorous look at motherhood. From the sleepless nights to the non-stop vomit, from the never-ending diapers to my now-crappy metabolism…I plan to make fun of it all.
Carl Jung once said, “I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become,” and thanks to Betty White, I feel a sudden and compelling need to make this come true. I mean, if an 88-year-old TV star can write a book on “celebrities and zoo animals,” surely I have a chance, right?
It is weird that I look to an 88-year-old for inspiration?Photo: Flickr/JJandAmes
I’ll take your silence as a “yes.”
Anyway, I’ve started a “Confessions” page on this blog to
- Get inspiration/anecdotes for my book, and
- To make myself feel better about my own wrong doings.
I’ve done things that I’m not proud of. Lots of things. I’ve lied to my kid about where her Dora the Explorer book really went and for years I let Ali believe that my Chicken Salaan (which evidently tastes just like his mom’s) was homemade. The hard truth is that it comes in a glass jar. From Trader Joe’s.
Can anyone relate? Do you have any stories to share? Any confessions to make? Any new moms want to tell us why they want to shoot themselves in the foot? How about you underpaid teachers – any kids throw up on you today? Anyone just need to vent and complain about their husband/boyfriend/the rude salesperson at Bloomingdale’s?
Simply leave a comment on the Confessions page telling us your story…anonymously or not. You’ll feel better, I’ll feel better, and I bet you a million dollars one of us can relate.
Sick of me yet? If by some miracle you aren’t, please check out my guest post on The Mom Chef’s blog. The Mom Chef is one super talented cook and is also a fabulous blogger. Head over if you have a minute!
While I'm not going to win Mother/Wife of the Year Award anytime soon, I haven't killed anyone yet or shot myself in the head. And that, my friends, is how I calculate success these days. 
FANCY THAT FANCY THIS 
Wow! you’re gonna write a book?? i just want to wish you all success at your first go at fiction. I am surely looking forward to seeing your book in print…
TC 🙂
Thank you Jane! I really appreciate your very nice comment!
YAY i remember you telling me about the book! i’m so excited! 😉
and thanks for the comment on the dress! means the world to me. does maya start school soon? we should get coffee together in westwood again! 😉
You are perfect to write a book like that! I always love your witty anecdotes to motherhood. I think every woman could relate. Love the idea!
dude..you are hilarious. I’ll read your shizzle cause your tone is right up my alley…alley meaning dark sarcastic alley.
wow that is such an amazing thing to do: write a book. i am in awe! you are going to write the best book ever. i’m wicked excited for it! i wish i had some motherhood stories myself…i’d feel bad telling you ones about my mother and grandmother…but maybe i will because my family is wayyyyyyyyyyy disfunctional
oops. i spelt dysfunctional wrong!
Yay! I love your sarcasm. I have no stories to share, but I’ll be rooting for you the entire time. I would love to see you get a book deal!
Nice! I wish you luck with the book- If it’s anything like what I read every week, you’ll definitely have something!
Your book is going to be hysterical! You crack me up with your postings anyway, so I’m sure your book will be great! Wishing you lots of luck.
You are writing a book!! Ameena this is fabulous news. Who are we to judge who you look to for inspiration?!
I’m so excited you’re going to be writing a book!! You’re such a talented writer 🙂
I love confessions… they always make me feel more normal! Haha 🙂
I love this idea! You would write a fabulous book — you are such an entertaining writer with great stories, and you’re HONEST! People will just eat it up!
And there is no problem in gaining inspiration from Betty White. She is an 88-year-old goddess 🙂
I love reading your stuff. I really hope you DO write a book
I can’t WAIT for your book!!!
Congratulations on the new book project!! I love all your posts on here so I am sure I will love the book (even though I am still a bit young to be a mother). I can’t wait to read it!!
Oh- and there is nothing wrong with looking up to Betty White. She is pretty freaking fantastic. lol
Love it! I’d read your book 🙂
that’s so exciting! good luck, can’t wait to read it!
(oh, and i will think of a few confessionals, as soon as i know what i’m willing to openly admit to…. 🙂
I’m not even in the mom-category (well, maybe…do two cats = one child?) and I would totally read your book. I really enjoy your writing and sense of humor. Yay for books!
Very exciting!!!! I can’t wait to read about the process!!
What a great idea! Your written ‘voice’ is so funny and accessible — as reader of your blog, I think this is a great idea! Looking forward to seeing the project come together… and reading the final product 🙂
Great idea Ameena! And I would SO buy your book =)….One of these days in the not to far away future, I will probably decide to become a mom too and need some good laughs. You absolutley have to make fun of the less than desirable things in life or you get wound up too tight and its no fun anymore. When I first started teaching, I wanted to start an anonymous blog about the annoying parts of teaching school. Then I realized I would probably be the only one that thought it was funny and then I’d get fired =)
LOL I thought about doing that too with my job…but I’d probably get fired too 🙂
Ameena, if anyone can write a book, it’s you! Remember that long and pretentious comment I left you, asking why you needed to write one? I felt so bad afterwards, because I was scared that I might have tainted your dreamy enthusiasm (and I am all for dreamy anything). As someone who is having the “kids vs no kids” discussion a lot lately, I totally rely on your blog (and eventually your book) to make educated, logical arguments to suit my forever flip-flopping opinion!
Jaya – Your comment was neither long nor pretentious…actually it really got me thinking about my motives and you made some very valid points, which you always do! I love your comments!
when you finish you book I will buy it 🙂
I like the confessions page idea! I have lots of them. Mostly just things that make me a bad girlfriend. Like if my boyfriend is hungry, I make him go to the store down the street because I won’t cook for him.
babe this is so exciting! I will totally be buying your book. Multiple copies. Gotta make you a bestseller so I can go on a book tour with you. And say things like, “I knew her way back when…”
Ameena,
Are going to write book. Go girl. So that can get a signed copy without standing in line, that is beacause i know you earlier. See my advantage.
Good for you on getting it going with your book. I too would love to write a book and I have started something but have kind of hit a wall!! Good luck and keep it up.
LOVE the idea. This is totally you. I plan to write a book at some point too, I am just trying to figure out about what. I will probably do a PhD program before that, so I have plenty of time. I am sure your book will turn out fabulously.
Oh my – this makes me so happy.
I used to write more wittier stuff – more sarcastic take on the ridiculous, and I mean ridiculous crap that has happened to me – from bad haircuts to car break-downs to fights with French people (long story…)…but then my mind gets dark again.
I would have so much to say!! But you have an awesome platform since you are a mother! I love your commitment and know you’ll get a book deal – and I’m the first to buy! …or maybe not cause everything comes to Canada later…but anyways! I only wish I had the time to devote to it…
The problem is I don’t even know what I would like to TRY to write! Fiction/ non-fiction? Reality, serious, funny, stupid chick-lit??
So then I worry and think maybe it’s not even what I should be doing if I can’t even concentrate to actually write…
I suck.
I’ve been wanting to write a book for a while now too. I’ve been putting it on the back burner for awhile due to school, getting my teacher credential and a few other things. Eventuallly it will happen. I like using Betty White as an inspiration. It makes a lot of sense, really. I’m excited for you 🙂
As you know, I’m really excited about this for you and can’t wait to hear more. We’ll have to meet up soon to discuss in person 🙂
Good for you! I’ve written two halves of books before…not two halves that fit together, but halves of different stories that just petered out later. I don’t think I’ll be able to actually finish one for several years, when I have (a) more life experience and (b) more tolerance for imperfection. The biggest stumbling block to actually finishing these projects is that I would read them over and believe they’re the absolute worst pieces of writing in existence, then despair and give up. If only I could write without editing at the same time, I could knock off a couple of novels a year!
I would SOOOOO read your book! Ah!!!! I love your writing voice, and I think soo many mothers can related to your story. You just have the guts to put it all out there 🙂
Ameena, I love your book idea! Heck, I’d buy your draft now if I could. I think I’ve told you before that I’m not a book reader, more of a TV watcher and video game player. But when you come out with your book, I’d gladly turn both those things off to read it cause I know it’d be much more entertaining.
As both a mother and a former underpaid teacher, I’m sure I’ve got some stories for you. I’ll have to add them later and maybe throughout the day between slaving to my two little piggies.
I would totally read your book. And I draw more inspiration from Betty White than I’d care to admit as well. I guess that’s kind of a confession…
Ameena, before I even read past the first paragraph of this post I was thinking of how well you would do writing a book in your signature charmingly sarcastic tone.
OH! and that venting about a rude salesperson at Bloomingdales- i actually JUST HAD that experience about a week ago! I’m going to brainstorm some confessions to add to your page, I’m sure my list would stretch for miles.
Sara
What a wonderful idea! I’m bookmarking your confessions page, and I’m looking forward to sharing my own and reading others. Love it!
I can’t wait until your book hits the shelves!! I will most definitely be waiting to buy it!! And maybe one day I can meet you to get an autographed copy!! 🙂 So exciting!! 🙂
You are such an amazing writer, Ameena, and I’m thrilled that you’re writing a book! The Confessions page is a great idea too!
i am so happy to read this post, ameena. we’ve already discussed it but to hear you “announce it” makes it that much more real – another step closer to the realisation of your goal. love it!
FAB-U-LOUS! You NEED to do this, it is your passion girl and you are so good at it! I am so freaking excited for you and can’t wait until I can pick up a copy 😉
I think we are all manifesting into our greatness from blogging. We are entering the world and who we are!
LOVE IT!
xxoo
I’m so excited your writing a book, I love your writing style & humour, it kinda fits with my own self depreciating attitude. Your confessions page is going to be a hoot…, I bet we all secretly visit it to have a giggle & relate more often than we’d care to admit.
Go You I say….., and may a writers block never grace your pages 🙂
Go Ameena! Do I have some stories for your page…I’ll get cracking!
Yeah. So I love you. And now I love you even more. Seriously.
Not many stories.
There were good times. But the bad times of my past seem to weigh heavier in my mind. Maybe that is why I tend to go to the dark side a lot. I think I am naturally witty/sarcastic, but I “lose” it because of that stuff…does that make sense?
I assume you will write the book before pitching it hey? I think you have a good platform with the mom-angle…and hell, you live in L.A.
Here is what I think. If you want to do it cause you want to do (not cause you think you should or for some grand money scheme) then good for you. And no rush! I think some people decide to write and think they’ll have a deal, etc in no time…when it LITERALLY takes years. Some of the most famous authors today wrote SEVERAL novels before even getting a 2nd-glance-read!
But you’re pretty neat. Love this post. Just wish I lived near you. WOuld love to go to a L.A. restaurant and chat.
Hey, need a live-in-caregiver while you write? I am SO there 😉
That’s a great reply. Writers don’t just happen overnight.
Good luck with your book! It’s something I’ve always wanted to do as well. I know I can find a story or twenty to share on your page. 🙂
First off – be careful. Betty White can do A LOT of things that most people can’t… at 88 and older, I have no doubt.
That said, you’re one hell of a writer. Betty or no Betty. If you don’t get on with it and start writing a book, we’re gonna have words. The spoken kind. 🙂
❤
I think your sense of humour would makr a great book!! And i have so many confessions, it’d take me an jour to type!
sorry i meant an hour. Ipod typing sure is hard…
Definitely write a book! It is the most satisfying feeling in the world, and just imagine seeing it on shelves at the book store! You can really do this! You have a terrific voice!
Congrats Ameena on your decision. Determination and discipline will definitely help you along with your talents. Go Go Go for it!
Oh I’m so excited for this book! You are so entertaining and even though I’m not a mother, I love your honest take on everything!
Wow, I was almost going to post about my recent decision to self publish my memoir (my somewhat humorous, tongue and cheek memoir of recovery). I this you should go for it! I teach kindergarten to fifth graders cooking classes in school, and lets just say its the best form of birth control. No offense, and I would like to have kids someday. Betty White is awesome, but she had plenty of ghost writers and publishers read for her to churn out something. I know a few people in literary agencies, let me know if I can help!
I never want kids, but I would buy your book in a heartbeat and read it cover to cover and most likely delight in every second of it 😉
I am so excited for your book. You have such a great voice and spot-on humor.
Awesome! Good for you. I love your blog and imagine I would love your book just as much.
Now, mothering confessions? I think I may have a thousand or two…
Good for you – I think about writing a book (a lot of people I work with do it – so I “get” the process/level of work, etc.) – but right now I concentrate just on publishing articles.
Good luck!
GREAT book idea! It will be a huge success! then I want you to sign my copy when you come visit Austin.
i dont have a confession to share, except that i would definitely read a sarcastic book you wrote! okay, that’s cheesey…but i mean it 🙂
I can’t wait for your book! Yes, it’s probably quite a ways away but I’m already psyched.
The Confesssions page is a great idea, Ameena. My mind is kind of a blank slate at the moment but as soon as something scribbles its way across it I’ll be getting my confession out.
Congratulations on getting started! I think you will be an amazing author- I will definitely buy your book. You make me laugh all the time with your witty writing so I think any book you write will be great. I think it’s a good idea to tie the blog in with it as well with your confessions page- and I have a lot of confessions myself. I’m very excited for you!
Ps: I love Betty White
I would absolutely read your book. Love your writing.
By the way… I love WEN! 🙂
That’s awesome!! I have a book idea in mind, too..but it’s sort of all over the place so it’ll be a while. Can’t wait to read more about it! 😀
I LOVE your book idea! I’ve always wanted to write a book, but never knew what I’d write about…your idea is so relatable and I’m sure it’s going to go straight to the top of the NY Times best seller’s list 😉
I’ll think of some confessions…I’ll be back!
That will be theee most hilarious book ever!! Very look forward to coming out soon cause you are a great story teller!! Can I get an autograph on it?? : )
Somehow I missed this post!
You are such an awesome writer on here…I can’t even imagine how good a book from you will be! I can’t wait!!!
Can you add me to the pre-sale list? 😉
I know it’s gonna be good- and I have a feeling my mom will love it too! She has a 10 year old to deal with right now…
You’re a good writer. Just by doing this blog shows your commitment to it. I say do it. Coming from one writer to another. hehehe… Do it, I Say!!!! 🙂
Ameena, I am SO proud of you! I always said you should write a book! I think you are such an intelligent, wonderful and genuinely beautiful person! I love your scathing sarcasm, your common sense nature, your insights and views! I promise you I will buy the book. Good luck! I know you will succeed- expect nothing less!
XOXO
Love,
Barbara
Ameena I would be way excited to have your book in my hands! I def love the pitch. Go for it…you’re witty and hilarious and the book is totally going to reflect that.
Oh this is amazing Ameena. I love your style of writing on the blog already, I am sure your book will be great too. Rooting for you!!!
ill defintely be buying that book!!!! soo awesome – congrats on the opportunity ameena!! 🙂