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ameena’s on vacation = ali’s turn

November 25, 2011

I’ve been asking my wife if I could do a guest post for months now and a few days ago she finally said yes. I’m sure her yes has more to do with her being too busy single-handedly bolstering New York’s economy more than anything.

In any case, after much brainstorming I emailed her a draft entitled “How to Keep Your Wife Happy.” And she replied with: “You need to make your stuff funnier. More sarcastic. This is neither.”

I have to wonder: was her tone really necessary?

Thanksgiving Lunch...

Anyway, once she makes a decision there’s no changing her mind. So I cut my losses and started over. This time I wrote about how she makes fun of me for being on my laptop/phone all the time but how she’s no better.

“You already wrote about this. Last year. It can’t be done again.”

My wife has the memory of an elephant.

Watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day floats being blown up...

So then I decided to write about her bizarre eating habits. I mean, what she can and can’t eat changes by the minute. Who can keep up? This time I texted her the idea while she was at Bloomingdale’s to avoid being shot down again.

“Should you be pointing fingers?” she asked. “This morning you said you couldn’t eat your potatoes because your mind was in a fog.”

Walking on 5th Avenue. Again...

So basically this post is about nothing. Other than the fact that I can’t do anything right.

What else is new?

120 Comments leave one →
  1. November 25, 2011 12:22 am

    And yet it managed to be hilarious! Great to hear the other side of the story. Plus, to Ameena and Maya, you both look absolutely stunning- please tell me where that watermelon-coloured coat is from?

    • November 25, 2011 1:14 pm

      Thank you Sara…My coat is from Macy’s!

    • November 25, 2011 3:15 pm

      Thanks – I am glad to be the source of amusement.

  2. November 25, 2011 12:42 am

    Wow!!! What an amazing post!! Only you can come up with such posts Ameena. Your posts always bring a smile on my face. The photographs are just brilliant. I loved the 2nd shot 🙂

    • November 25, 2011 1:15 pm

      Thanks Nishi. 🙂 Hope you had a great Thanksgiving!

  3. November 25, 2011 1:00 am

    Ha Ha Ha…. now thats how a fun relationship is 🙂 🙂

    Great pictures 🙂

  4. November 25, 2011 1:23 am

    Ameena, You and Maya look so beautiful. New York can do that to you. Haven’t been there in a long time, I miss it. Have a wonderful visit there!

    • November 25, 2011 1:15 pm

      Thank you Fran! I’m so happy here and I think it shows.

  5. November 25, 2011 2:02 am

    I envy Maya- watching mommy and daddy interact must be the funniest thing ever! Great post, Ali! Hope you guys are having a blast in the Big Apple 😀

  6. November 25, 2011 2:06 am

    I envy Maya- watching mommy and daddy interact must be the funniest thing ever! Great post, Ali! Hope you guys are having a blast in the Big Apple 😀 (sorry for the double comment–> denimstory is my work blog :))!

    • November 25, 2011 1:16 pm

      Maya has no idea what’s going on so she usually just ignores both of us.

    • November 25, 2011 3:17 pm

      Thank you – I am looking for an opportunity for Ali tells all soon.l

  7. November 25, 2011 2:17 am

    pictures have come out beautiful .. happy thanks giving ..
    good post

  8. November 25, 2011 5:13 am

    You two need a sitcom. Or a reality TV show. Or both.

    • November 25, 2011 1:17 pm

      Our regular lives would be way too boring for reality TV. We’re home by 7pm and sleeping by 9:30. Nobody would want to watch us!

  9. November 25, 2011 7:01 am

    lol…great to meet the Mr.
    Ameena, I NEED your wardrobe!! That jacket is amazing!

  10. November 25, 2011 7:30 am

    😀 Bwahahaah, I loved the post and photographs so much 🙂
    Women love sarcasm…

  11. November 25, 2011 8:10 am

    Haha I love this! Especially the comment about potatoes. That’s the best reasoning I’ve ever heard.

    • November 25, 2011 1:18 pm

      Yes, who knew that potatoes had anything to do with ones thought process?

  12. November 25, 2011 8:28 am

    Funny! You and Maya look like total New Yorkers, chic and hip and gorgeous. Honestly that child got the absolute best from the both of you, she is so sweet. Have you hit up Dylan’s candy bar yet? I am sure Maya will remind you. Enjoy your vacation.

    • November 25, 2011 1:20 pm

      Thank you Marie! We just got back from Dylan’s. It was a madhouse and $40 later I think we are set as far as candy goes. For a while!

  13. November 25, 2011 8:29 am

    LOL! I was cracking up at this 🙂

    I love the pictures too!

  14. November 25, 2011 8:49 am

    I think you are a lucky guy! 🙂 you have a beautiful family!

  15. November 25, 2011 9:03 am

    Ali – I honestly feel for you now. Ameena has been good in shredding you and your habits to bits, and to an extent people who comment here have aided her in doing a good job of it. I put my hand up and accept I too is guilty. That said, I see another side today and one which needs to come on here more often. I mean we all know about your orange jumper, and your laptop(s) and so on but I think its fair to say we (as dedicated followers to this blog) need to see more of you, hear more from you and above all tell us stuff about Ameena which she can’t show or tell her self.

    • November 25, 2011 3:20 pm

      Thanks – apparently Ameena has so much content to work with, she hardly finds time to squeeze me in for my own bits. But I am working on it.

    • November 25, 2011 6:18 pm

      Yes Ali…what can you tell my readers about my strange quirks/crazy habits?

  16. November 25, 2011 9:58 am

    –Simply Brilliant!

    Ali, by you saying nothing, you said everything. Haaaa.


  17. November 25, 2011 10:24 am

    great guest post ali…did you do any shopping for yourself?

    • November 25, 2011 3:21 pm

      This trip was all about my wife and daughter – I believe they intend to spend my share here for me.

    • November 25, 2011 6:19 pm

      I bought Ali a nice scarf! How quickly he forgets…

      • November 26, 2011 5:53 pm

        I really need to work on my memory.

      • November 28, 2011 7:30 pm

        LOL you both are so funny!

  18. November 25, 2011 11:18 am

    haha i love this! it’s inevitable that a husband and wife will drive each other crazy, but being able to laugh about it is what it’s all about!

    • November 25, 2011 6:19 pm

      The truth is that this blog has totally helped us laugh at each other. It’s a cheap form of marriage counseling!

  19. November 25, 2011 12:11 pm

    Keep on pushing through the fog, Ali.

    Ameena, the hair in these snaps is so beyond 11/10. Also, nice boots 😉

    • November 25, 2011 6:20 pm

      Oh Kat…you always know how to make me feel like a million bucks. 11/10! I’ll remember your compliment forever.

  20. November 25, 2011 12:17 pm

    Ali, you are a good guy :D!
    Hope all of you are having loads of fun in NYC! And bagels!
    *kisses* HH

    • November 25, 2011 3:22 pm

      Not much on bagels, just Kati Rolls.

    • November 25, 2011 6:20 pm

      HH – you would love the Kati Rolls! They far surpass the bagels.

  21. November 25, 2011 12:19 pm

    Shhhhhh…don’t tell Ameena, but your post was pretty funny.

    • November 25, 2011 6:21 pm

      Oh Kimberly…we both know I edited Ali’s post. Greatly!!

  22. November 25, 2011 12:38 pm

    Happy Thanksgiving. You guys crack me up. Maya will surely grow up to be one of the greatest writers having genes from both of you. 😉

  23. November 25, 2011 2:50 pm

    Hahaha! Another great post. Always too funny to hear the other side of the story.
    Loving the beautiful pics of mother and daughter! Hope you’re having a wonderful time in your favorite city :D.

    • November 25, 2011 6:28 pm

      Thank you LeQuan! We are having a fabulous time…

  24. November 25, 2011 3:07 pm

    I hope you all had a very happy Thanksgiving in the big city! This post reminds me of the fact that I can never figure out what to write, so I either write nothing or I ramble.
    Ali – Jokes aside from not being able to do anything right, you are doing SOMETHING right when considering your amazing family. Props to you!

    • November 25, 2011 3:26 pm

      Thank you – I do my best 🙂

    • November 25, 2011 6:30 pm

      Thank you for the compliment my friend!

      And happy belated Thanksgiving Jenna! I hope you had a great one.

      • November 26, 2011 11:17 am

        Thank you!
        It wasn’t NYC, but it was family, so I can’t complain. 🙂

  25. November 25, 2011 3:42 pm

    It’s okay, Ali. No men can ever do anything right. It’s just a fact of nature. 😉

    Ameena, I LOVE your pink coat in that picture!

  26. November 25, 2011 11:45 pm

    about Time Ali 😛 …. kinda scary post to read though for a single man like me for If thats what the future holds 😛 …………….ah well :D…. and belated happy thanksgiving to you all 🙂

    • November 26, 2011 6:18 pm

      Eddie…you are lucky to have a very honest view of marriage! I’ve tempered your expectations…

  27. November 26, 2011 1:15 am

    Well, “can’t do anything right” is a bit of an exaggeration. The holiday was spent in NY so you get an A+ on that one.

    Loved the post!

    • November 26, 2011 5:57 pm

      Exactly. Once in a wihle I get good ideas. My problem is not fumbling it later.

    • November 26, 2011 6:19 pm

      Good point Kristen…Ali did do that right.

  28. November 26, 2011 2:45 am

    This post made me smile. I love how you are boosting NYC’s economy… that’s great! The second photo looks so familiar. 🙂 Great post.

  29. November 26, 2011 6:31 am

    Ali, my heart goes out to you. I’ve been trying to keep up with the food stuff too. The one thing I do have down is that your lovely wife doesn’t eat meat. With all that said, those photos and this post ooze of love. The three of you are a beautiful, wonderful family. Thanks for the early morning smile and for how you guys constantly make my day.

    • November 26, 2011 5:59 pm

      Thank you for your gracious compliments.

    • November 26, 2011 6:20 pm

      My eating habits even confuse me…I feel your pain.

      And thank YOU for making my day with your comments!

  30. November 26, 2011 9:54 am

    I can’t imagine Mr Glam guesting on my blog. What a good job you’ve done Ali. Everyone looks like they’re having a great time in NY. A perfect time of year to be there, Thanksgiving and Christmas en-masse. GG

  31. November 26, 2011 1:28 pm

    Haha I was hoping for a post from Ali some day. This was hilarious.

    • November 26, 2011 6:21 pm

      Thank you Mads! I hope you had a great Thanksgiving!

  32. November 26, 2011 1:45 pm

    thanks for the guest post ali. I particularly enjoy the photos. Hope you all had an amazing thanksgiving!

    • November 26, 2011 6:01 pm

      I really hate planning trips. The flights, the hotels, too many options. Ameena has this down to an art. And she did an unbelieveable job getting us to our favorite restaurants, including making sure I had a traditional thanksgiving feast on t-day.

      Hope your Thanksgiving was wonderful too.

    • November 26, 2011 6:21 pm

      Happy belated Thanksgiving Daisy…I hope you had a great one!

  33. November 26, 2011 5:15 pm

    Nice pictures!

  34. November 26, 2011 5:30 pm

    I totally didn’t believe Ali wrote this post until I saw the comments. Perhaps a regular “Ali Tells All” column is in order? 🙂 Happy Thanksgiving, friends!

    • November 26, 2011 6:02 pm

      If I did that, I am not sure anyone would hear or see me again!

  35. November 26, 2011 6:22 pm

    Happy Thanksgiving my friend! Ali did write this but of course I had to edit. Quite a bit!

  36. November 26, 2011 8:09 pm

    Long live the dance we do with our husbands and the fact that some day’s we’re the pigeon and somedays we’re the statue!!

    Well done Ali – You’ve done Ameena proud… :)))

    chow! Devaki @ weavethousandflavors

    • November 28, 2011 2:50 pm

      The pigeon and the statue…so well put!

    • November 28, 2011 7:18 pm

      I always try to make myself useful – ensures a long tenure in the house.

  37. November 27, 2011 6:42 am

    Hi Ali (waving).. I agree with others that maybe you could blog guest every now and then so your voice could be “heard” as well – not that you need to defend yourself as I believe Ameena’s stories are the truth… 🙂

    Hope you guys had a great vacation & Thanksgiving in NYC. Ameena, LOVE the new boots!

    • November 28, 2011 2:50 pm

      Thank you for believing in me Lydia! I tell the truth. Most of the time. 🙂

      • November 28, 2011 7:18 pm

        If I had to comment on each post – I would be on here full time defending myself!

  38. November 27, 2011 4:57 pm

    “My wife has the memory of an elephant” Haha! What a classic. Maya has such witty genes (if that’s even a thing)! Hope you guys had a great time in NYC.

    • November 28, 2011 2:51 pm

      Maya is already a smart ass so I do think witty genes can be passed down…. 🙂

  39. November 27, 2011 6:39 pm

    Good to hear from the other side of the pyramid. No worries Ali, my husband can’t say it right either. :)~ Great post and it looks like a fun time in NY.

    • November 28, 2011 2:51 pm

      Can any husband say it right? I have yet to meet one…

      • November 28, 2011 7:19 pm

        I feel happy knowing at least I am on par.
        Next year’s resolution is to one-up.

  40. November 27, 2011 8:20 pm

    Great guest post!!!

    I am too afraid to let my hubby do one 🙂 Hehe!

    • November 28, 2011 2:52 pm

      You just have to be prepared to edit for clarity my friend. Only then can a husband guest post!

  41. November 27, 2011 8:35 pm

    Aw! Those sounded like good ideas, but she does have final say. Great photos anyway!

  42. November 27, 2011 10:55 pm

    Loved reading this! And loved meeting your lovely family this past weekend, Ameena!
    Ali, you need to make more cameos on the blog.

    • November 28, 2011 2:53 pm

      Loved meeting you too Sam! Thanks again. 🙂

    • November 28, 2011 7:20 pm

      Nice meeting you too – I will try to be a more regular contributor if I get the approvals.

  43. Piya permalink
    November 27, 2011 11:18 pm

    haha such a funny post, especially the potatoes bit :D. ali should guest post more often!!

  44. November 28, 2011 4:36 am

    Wait, I want to hear more about your eating. Ali, spill the beans (or lack of beans). Hope you had a great NYC visit.

    • November 28, 2011 2:53 pm

      How much time do you have Lauren? My eating habits is a long, long conversation.

  45. November 28, 2011 7:15 am

    Haha – at least Ali got a chance to guest post. I have yet to agree to let Forrest take over the blog; however, my dog has blogged twice 🙂 Hope you guys had a blast in NYC!

    • November 28, 2011 2:54 pm

      Your dog has guest posted? Now that’s seriously impressive!

  46. November 28, 2011 11:33 am

    Oh lordy, this had me laughing out loud. Love the pictures. Hope the NY trip was awesome.

    • November 28, 2011 2:54 pm

      Thanks Kim. The trip was awesome! Didn’t want to come back. As usual!

  47. November 28, 2011 11:48 am

    It seems to me that you’ve got what matters down to a T!

  48. November 29, 2011 6:08 pm

    You are the dynamic duo. Love it. And she’s just a stunner in these photos (not in any bit surprised FYI- she just GLOWS in nyc!)

  49. November 29, 2011 7:54 pm

    I meant to comment to Ali as well: Great job keeping us interested in a post about nothing. Loved it. And Ameena, I love the coat. Can we bring back the bartering system? I’m sure I have something in my closet that you might like to trade for it!

    • November 30, 2011 9:45 am

      Bartering is a fabulous idea…I’m always up for a trade. 🙂

  50. November 30, 2011 5:38 am

    Ali, I love your guest posts! This was so funny again! And kudos for not giving up! Your not-giving-up made a perfect little story in the end. 🙂

  51. November 30, 2011 5:48 pm

    Dude, your post was funny AND sarcastic. LOL at the effort you put into making the previous drafts. She obviously gets you. You guys must be such a cute couple, mashallah 😀

  52. December 1, 2011 10:14 am

    ha ha, you two are hilarious. A post about nothing, yet says so much. Who knew? Why can’t I be as clever as this post?

    I feel like I know your family thru your blog Ameena. I even know your schedule of traveling to NYC during Thanksgiving (ok, sounds kinda creepy when I type it out). Hope you guys had wonderful time in the city.

  53. Leslie permalink
    December 5, 2011 4:08 pm

    Ali, I don’t personally know another wife that let’s her husband guestblog. You are special clearly. I recognize the snark for what it is, so I don’t really believe you’re ALWAYS on your laptop.

    My personal favorite anecdote about you is the episode where Ameena dropped a slippery bottle of turmeric (maybe curry powder?) all over the kitchen floor Instead of helping her clean up, you ran to get your camera to take a picture of her petite derriere as she mopped up on her hands & knees for a post. Blog before cleanliness!

    Happy Wife = Happy Life

    So you should all be quite content as Ameena adores you, Maya and your life together.

    A belated Happy Thanksgiving!

    • December 5, 2011 9:32 pm

      Oh yes…the turmeric is still in the crevices of my granite floor. Never to be removed. Ever. But we have a picture of me cleaning it up forever too! 🙂

  54. December 10, 2011 12:25 pm

    Well done Ali, your post about nothing was delightful!


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