11 years later
In honor of our 11th wedding anniversary I’ve decided to give Ali a break.
This means that as much as I want to, I won’t talk about the fact that he left one tablespoon of oatmeal in the otherwise empty canister yesterday. I also won’t mention how he instructed me on how to load the dishwasher properly.
That’s right, he tried to tell me how to load the dishwasher. Properly.
Some things are better left unsaid.
Instead I’ll try not to make things all about me for change.
Me: “What do I do that irritates you?”
Ali: “You don’t close the dishwasher so that it clicks shut.”
Me: “Why are you so obsessed with the dishwasher? What else about me bothers you?”
Me: “No really, I want to know what else I do that irritates you.”
Ali: “You leave 1 second on the microwave and you don’t clear it.”
Me: “After 11 years those are the only things I do that annoy you?”
I don’t get it. I can list 50 things that I do that annoy the living S@#$ out of myself. How can my husband not have a similar list?
So now that I said he’s a better person than me – for everyone on the Internet to see – I don’t need to get him an actual gift. Right?