i lecture too much
Why is it that every second sentence that comes out of my mouth is me lecturing Maya about something? Why do I say things like:
“I’m not answering that question because you’ve already asked me the same thing 65 times.”
“One more story and that’s it, okay? Mama has like 50 other things to do.”
The truth is that sometimes I really don’t have anything else to do, I just don’t want to read about Pinkalicious and her obsession with cupcakes again. Other times I just want to get dinner made and the dishes done so I can spend 15 quality minutes with the TV before I fall asleep.
Yesterday I was feeling especially mean as I lectured her again about putting her toys all over my chair. So after she walked off in a huff I sat down (on the newly emptied chair) to ponder what drives me to be the way I am. And after much reflection I came to this conclusion:
I am extraordinarily selfish and I don’ t like to be inconvenienced in any way.
I can’t come up with a good reason why I am this way. I’ve heard that having children makes you less selfish and yet I am as self-centered as ever.
Can someone please help me see the light? Before I have to start saving for Maya’s therapy fund in earnest?