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i didn’t think i’d make it this far

March 14, 2011

7 Things nobody ever told me about motherhood:

1. You will have the urge to bang your head against a brick wall daily. Hard.

2. Having to handle your child’s baby teeth is grosser than cleaning up the never-ending vomit.

3. The snack you bring to school once a month will be subject to much contemplation and discussion, and ultimately disapproval.

4. Friends of your kindergarten-going child will call you by your first name. And there is nothing you can do about it.

5. Sirius radio will become a must-have in your car simply because “Kids Place” will shut your child up for 15 minute stretches.

6. You’ll have to establish a quota for questions each day in order to prevent yourself from going mad.

7. On your child’s birthday you’ll wonder why nobody is giving you gifts, seeing as you were the one who did all the hard work.

One thing everyone told me about motherhood…

Times flies by.

And….she’s 6.

89 Comments leave one →
  1. raana permalink
    March 14, 2011 1:45 am

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MAYA!!!!I am sure you guys had great fun on her birthday.She looks so cute in her tiara.

  2. March 14, 2011 3:04 am

    Happy Birthday Maya! I hope she had a fabulous party.

    What do you do with the baby teeth? They are so gross.

    • March 15, 2011 12:57 pm

      After the “tooth fairy” took them away I have no idea what happened to them. This makes me nervous because I feel like I will run into them when I am not prepared!!

  3. March 14, 2011 3:17 am

    Happy Birthday Maya!

    She really is such an adorable little thing. I hope she had a good birthday. And I hope you were able to keep hold of a little sanity- I’ve chaperoned a kid’s bday party or two and omg…

  4. March 14, 2011 3:43 am

    Awe… Happy Birthday Maya 🙂

  5. March 14, 2011 3:47 am

    happy birthday to maya. 😀 lol you deserve gifts on her bday 😀 lol surely

  6. March 14, 2011 4:24 am

    how sweet!!! that pic is adorable..time does fly !!! i wrote a post about time flying by recently as well..anyway happy birthday to maya!!!! so cute

  7. March 14, 2011 4:41 am

    What a great picture! Happy Birthday Maya!!! 🙂

  8. March 14, 2011 4:42 am

    Happy happy birthday to Maya! Hope her day (and yours) is wonderful. 🙂

  9. March 14, 2011 4:52 am

    aww 🙂 Happy birthday to Miss Maya!!

  10. March 14, 2011 4:54 am

    Happy Birthday to Maya!

  11. March 14, 2011 5:13 am

    Happy Birthday Maya! a fellow Pisces 🙂

  12. March 14, 2011 5:17 am

    Happy Birthday, Maya!!!! Great cake!

  13. March 14, 2011 5:26 am

    Happy Bday to Maya! Looks like she’s having a blast in the picture.

  14. March 14, 2011 6:05 am

    Oh wow, happy birthday Maya!!

    I can’t believe her friends call you by your first name – I’m 22 and my friend’s parents are still Mr & Mrs!

  15. March 14, 2011 6:07 am

    Happy Birthday Maya!! I had to laugh at the Sirius radio bit because I have XM in my car and have told my children, not just told but swore on my life, that there are no children’s stations. Totally selfish lie done to spare myself having to listen to Hanna Montana or the Jonas Brothers.

  16. March 14, 2011 6:19 am

    Happy Birthday Maya! I love the picture, priceless.

    You know when I came to the US, I had no culture shock what so ever. Everyone kept asking me this and I had to repeat nope, no culture shock. But yeah, coming from a country where even an older stranger lady is called aunty, young kids calling me by my first name, was a big shock! I mean a Mrs. would be nice to hear.

  17. March 14, 2011 6:41 am

    So True I can totally relate especially to #1… almost walking around with a permanent brick bruise on my forehead. I hope Maya has a Wonderful Birthday and that in her 6th year she will learn how to curb her tongue, or would that be a perfect present for you.

  18. March 14, 2011 6:47 am

    Happy Birthday to Maya (and many accolades to you for giving birth to and raising her!) Everything you say about motherhood just reaffirms that mothers are truly the most admirable people in the world!

  19. March 14, 2011 6:54 am

    Yay! Happy Birthday Maya (and mubarak mama, on surviving another year)! I love the tiara and the pink cake. You think it’s too late for me to throw myself a princess party? 🙂

  20. March 14, 2011 7:14 am

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MAYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Such a great picture! Your baby girl is 6! Despite all your sarcastic posts, I know how proud you must be. Big hugs to Maya and you too, dear! My kids’ bdays are the happiest days in my life, and I know you know exactly how it feels.Time really does fly by huh? Before you know it, you’ll be doing a post on college and how her guy friends will be calling you Maya’s hot mom. Ha! Let’s just enjoy being called Ameena for now ;-). Oh, and I’m glad you put #1 as #1.

    • March 14, 2011 7:16 am

      Oops, I meant “how her guy friends call you Maya’s hot mom”.

  21. March 14, 2011 7:31 am

    Maya looks pretty in that shot..Happy Birthday to Maya!

  22. March 14, 2011 7:36 am

    Someday I hope to experience all of these. And I plan to wear a helmut so when I hit my head against the wall, it won’t hurt so bad 😉

  23. March 14, 2011 7:40 am

    Happy birthday Maya! Times have clearly changed because I still call the parents of my childhood friends Mr and Mrs so-and-so.

  24. March 14, 2011 7:58 am

    Happy Birthday to Maya!

  25. March 14, 2011 8:05 am

    Happy birthday Maya!

  26. March 14, 2011 8:05 am

    gosh. happy birthday! that picture is so precious! my mom tells me all the time how she remembers when i was soooooooooooo little and how it feels like yesterday that she was holding me in the hospital hahah

    and i STILL call my friend’s parents mr. and mrs blah blah blah. i feel so awkward calling them by their first name

  27. March 14, 2011 8:12 am

    awwww happy birthday to maya! i love her pink explosion birthday cake—so precious.

    ps- i feel weird calling ppl of my parents’ age by their 1st name even if they’re not desi. hehe

  28. March 14, 2011 8:18 am

    you are definitely doing a great job at preparing me for motherhood 🙂 and ill be sure to buy a hardhat, some earplugs and muzzle.

    p.s. Happy Birthday Maya.

  29. March 14, 2011 8:26 am

    That is a really cute picture! Happy birthday to Maya!!
    And that’s so funny about the teeth… I read recently that someone mailed Ke$ha a molar tooth and she turned it into an earing and wears it. Maybe you should send Maya’s teeth in too!

  30. March 14, 2011 8:50 am

    Happy Birthday to Maya! And Congratulations to you Ameena. You have survived another princess birthday. Those of us mothers with daughters who like princesses (unlike their mothers) I think it is a miracle that we survive a princess party. I thought about throwing a “party” for myself and register at Neiman Marcus and Pottery Barn. But then who would take me seriously?

  31. March 14, 2011 8:55 am

    Aww, happy birtday to the little princess. I bet you made it absolutely wonderful for her. Yes time does fly. If only there were a stop button on them (sometimes). I already think about when my boy will be driving, liking girls, etc. He’s about to be 11. I’m not ready for it…

    Anyway, what a pretty pink cake. 🙂

  32. March 14, 2011 9:11 am

    Aww, how precious! An angel for at least day 🙂

  33. March 14, 2011 9:41 am

    Happy Birthday Maya!!!!

  34. March 14, 2011 10:16 am

    happy birthday maya! did anyone tell you that your child might also wear that very same tiara when she turns 27? yes, i wore that exact one last month. claire’s right? this is embarassing…

  35. March 14, 2011 10:30 am

    I know what you mean about not knowing what comes along with motherhood and I am not looking forward to the losing the teeth thing…that will be given to the hubby!!

  36. March 14, 2011 10:30 am

    Are you regifting this year? 😉
    And thank you ameena, your advice is by far the cheapest form of birth birth control (and I really mean that in the best possible way).

  37. March 14, 2011 10:36 am

    Happy Birthday Maya!!
    Shes such a pretty little girl, when she becomes a teenager, watch out! 🙂

  38. March 14, 2011 12:46 pm

    What a great Picture of Maya!! She’s growing up…and yes time flies. When you are having fun right??? Hope she had a fun party. I see lot of pink!!

  39. March 14, 2011 12:53 pm

    Ha, that thing with the baby teeth kills me. Say “cheeeeeeeese” daaahling! LOL
    Lovely pic of Maya, she looks like a beautiful birthday princess 😀
    *kisses* HH

  40. March 14, 2011 1:07 pm

    OHMYGOSH THE INFAMOUS AGE 6!!! AHHH! I actually like the 6-7 year age range… at least for kids I have taught, counseled and babysat!

    I think you should buy yourself something on maya’s bday every year =) you have my permission. do it!!!!! ❤

  41. March 14, 2011 1:48 pm

    your daughter is beautiful. While I agree with the banging your head against the wall (were you in my apartment this morning)? The baby teeth never grossed me out. After all the butt wiping the teeth were easy. My son turned 7 last week, time does fly but I’d take a 7 year old over a toddler any day.

  42. March 14, 2011 3:21 pm

    divine cake first of all. second of all, happy bday to your little creation =)

  43. March 14, 2011 3:58 pm

    Happy Birthday Princess Maya. And Ameena, you get the mom of the year award!

  44. March 14, 2011 4:45 pm

    Happy birthday to Maya! 🙂

    Love the one about the lunch box. I totally remember doing that as a kid (and being ashamed because my mom never gave us cool stuff) and have literally thought before about how to handle that when I am a parent…I don’t want them to eat all junk for lunch but if that’s what it takes for me to look cool, it’s okay right? 🙂

  45. March 14, 2011 5:56 pm

    Oh, Happy Birthday Maya! And what a marvelous poodle cake to celebrate with 🙂

    I think #3 is my favorite fact – I already fret about what “dish to pass” when my girlfriends and I get together for a little in-house HH.

  46. March 14, 2011 6:45 pm

    the cake is amazing! I totally relate to #1, but more than ‘bang’ I always say BASH my head into a wall. I think it really illustrates my frustrations.

    Out of the seven, #6 for me is the one that makes me go the most insane. The incessant questions never stop and when I don’t feel like answering or if I answer with less zeal and enthusiasm, i am then bombarded with a new set of questions as to why I am not answering her questions the why I usually. ARGGGhhhh, I can’t ever win. 🙂

  47. March 14, 2011 6:52 pm

    Ameena! The one about questions is my favorite since Tater never quits talking anymore!!

    I love this post, and I’m including it in my Saturday favorites for the week 🙂

  48. March 14, 2011 7:26 pm

    Happy Birthday Maya. You look very pretty.

    Ameena do show her all the wishes she got (i mean comments).

    I’m glad you told about those seven things, it’ll help me what not to expect when I’m there.

  49. March 15, 2011 12:11 am

    You & my Momma would agree on this one for sure Ameena…., she always used to ‘pretend’ (so we thought) for her gifts on our birthday. I never used to get it at the time, but now I see some of my girlfriends raising kids & as I’m not really into kids I give my gal pals a super good gift on their kids birthday…., goes over pretty good too 😉
    Happy Birthday Maya…. and well done Ameena, here’s to you girl 🙂 🙂

  50. March 15, 2011 2:57 am

    omygosh your daughter is gorgeous, did you know that? (probably. 😉 ) happy birthday to her! hope you all survived the big day!

    p.s. baby teeth is grosser than vomit? really???

  51. March 15, 2011 4:33 am

    Happy Birthday!! You are the best looking youngest mom I know! 🙂

    (P.S – Finally realized why I wasn’t getting the updates – it was being sent to another address I plugged in!)

  52. March 15, 2011 7:30 am

    Happy late birthday Maya! I think that you should get gifts too;) Does the head banging work?

  53. March 15, 2011 7:47 am

    Happy birthday Maya!
    I can’t help but notice Maya’s tiara and her barbie pink princess poodle cake 🙂 She is 100% girlie girl!
    Do the other mothers really scrutinize your snack choices? That seems so catty and pretentious, it reminds me of high school.

    • March 16, 2011 12:49 pm

      There are so many rules when it comes to snack day…and Maya has way too many opinions as well. And trust me, when your kid is in school it’s like you are going through it yourself…all over again.

  54. Leslie permalink
    March 15, 2011 9:48 am

    Happy Birthday, Maya!

    Happy Giving Birth to Maya (and Raising Her 2) Day, Ameena!

    Ali doesn’t get his own greeting cuz we know he slacked off, right? lolz

  55. March 15, 2011 9:50 am

    Happy Birthday Maya! I can’t even imagine how fast that time flies. I can’t believe our 2 years living on this island are almost over. I have no clue where the time went.

  56. March 15, 2011 10:15 am

    Happy Birthday to the little princess. She is gorgeous! I love her hair.

    You know, here in Texas where we are, all kids call us with a title of Ms. or Mr. added to the first name. never the straight first name. I was stunned when we moved from NJ, and was happy. They get rebuked by the parents, if they call elders by their first name.

  57. March 15, 2011 11:47 am

    Happy birthday to Maya! OMG if I ever was guilty of #4 as a kid, my parents would have slapped me! Thank goodness for the generic “uncle” and “aunty” for us Desis!

  58. March 15, 2011 12:19 pm

    Happy Birthday Maya! looks like she had a great party:)

  59. March 15, 2011 6:16 pm

    Happy Birthday to Maya! You are a very lucky Mom!! 🙂 And yes, time goes soooooo fast.

  60. March 15, 2011 7:52 pm

    Gosh….I just loved this post. After reading your last “item” I scrolled down and saw that beautiful photograph of your sweet girl. My heart just melted. She makes it all worth it, I’m sure!

  61. March 15, 2011 11:54 pm

    Happy birthday to Maya!!
    I think you should get presents too (I mean, just look at things no 1, 2, 5, 6 and 7! Although thing no 2 seems like reason enough)

  62. March 16, 2011 5:01 am

    Aaww, happy birthday Maya!! And that cake looks fantastic! I bet she enjoyed it 😀

  63. March 16, 2011 8:34 am

    Oh, it really does go by so fast!
    Kids Place now makes me want to bang my head against a wall too! At least have an extra piece of cake–the not getting the gifts when you did all the hard work really is unfair!

  64. March 16, 2011 8:38 am

    Happy Birthday Maya! And Great Job for Surviving and Thriving the past 6 years Ameena. Nothing is harder than raising kids. Yes, the questions, never ending. After 3 kids and years and years of questions I have actually become quite adept at staying on my own train of thought while answering them. It takes practice but I have faith in you.

  65. March 16, 2011 10:01 am

    Happy birthday to Maya! Ameena, it’s possible you birthed one of the most beautiful girls ever.

  66. March 16, 2011 12:06 pm

    Perfect post, perfect photo and *sigh* it does go fast, doesn’t it? Happy birthday to all of you! XO

  67. March 16, 2011 1:37 pm

    Happy Birthday Maya! Time does fly, it really does…
    P.S. I would give you presents too 😉

  68. March 16, 2011 2:08 pm

    You need to frame that picture!

  69. March 16, 2011 2:42 pm

    I read that first one and burst out laughing out loud, which is rare for me. So, so true. As is the never-ending questions.

    I am stunned by your daughter’s beauty.

    Congrats on making it through the first five years. Seeing you be able to do it gives me hope.

  70. March 16, 2011 3:13 pm

    Aww, how precious is that picture of Maya?? Happy Birthday, Maya! I can’t believe she’s 6! I feel like she was 4 just yesterday! As for the list of things nobody ever told you – #2 is what I’m dreading most. And, is #4 really true?? You are a brave soul, Ameena 🙂

  71. March 16, 2011 3:51 pm

    Ah, baby teeth. My mom kept all of mine, which really, why? But then, do you throw them away? Make them into a necklace? It’s a quandary.

  72. March 16, 2011 3:58 pm

    really? they call you by your first name? to this day i refer to friends’ parents as “mr & mrs” or, if they were close family friends, “auntie x and uncle y”.

    the nerve of kids!

  73. Kath (My Funny Little Life) permalink
    March 16, 2011 5:09 pm

    I’m still most afraid of pregnancy and how weird it would probably make me feel … But then your list, on top of it … I just admire every woman who is a mother!

  74. Erika permalink
    March 16, 2011 6:12 pm

    A belated Happy Birthday to beautiful Maya..Hope your princess has many more wonderful birthdays. I had to laugh with the snack part. Kids are not always as apprieciative at this age and yes lots of snack rules in school. But when some of my kids do sports all the kids want the snack there. Including all the little siblyings. lol Easier to please there or more hungry after game..enjoy your blog..

  75. March 16, 2011 6:28 pm

    Happy Birthday to Maya!!!

    PS. I want my future children’s friends to call me by my first name. I just can’t imagine being called Mrs. whatevermylastnamemaybe.

    • nadia khan permalink
      March 18, 2011 4:48 pm

      that’s my baby’s name….love it;)

  76. nadia khan permalink
    March 18, 2011 4:49 pm

    that is the most beautiful pic ive seen of my lil bday princess….xoxoxo

  77. March 19, 2011 5:16 am

    I need to set a quota of questions.

    Happy Birthday to your little girl!

  78. March 19, 2011 6:30 am

    Oh, this is so funny! And true.

    Except the first name thing. Here in the South, that is a big no-no.

  79. March 19, 2011 10:39 pm

    Aw Belated birthday wishes to Maya! and you my girl for everything you been writing for us to enjoy while you suffer (not ;-))

  80. March 20, 2011 4:39 pm

    Your princess daughter is so beautiful! 🙂

  81. March 22, 2011 7:16 am

    Happy belated birthday to Maya!

  82. March 25, 2011 3:48 am

    happy belated bday maya!!! I love how you steal things!! BTW what snack do you bring once a month? I’m dying to know!

    • March 27, 2011 8:18 am

      I usually bring cheese and crackers…sometimes bananas. I really do go buy 24 bananas! How random, right?

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