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Marking Time with Magazines

December 17, 2009

For the last year I have spent a good part of my life and my salary at the dentist’s office. I am not exaggerating. The weird thing is that I went from having perfect teeth while sporadically visiting my dentist for “regular” cleanings, to suddenly needing a root canal, 3 crowns and 2 fillings, all in the last year.  I just don’t get it.  Normally I’d place the blame firmly on Maya’s little shoulders (as I do my stomach issues) but I don’t think pregnancy can affect health of my teeth.  Can it?

Anyway, back to the root canal.  Talk about pain.  I have had a child and the root canal procedure and recovery were 50 times worse.  Again, I am not exaggerating.  I now visit the dentist like clockwork every 6 months and spend more time brushing and flossing than I do eating.  I also approach each visit with extreme caution and much anxiety.  So imagine by shock and dismay when  I was told by my new dentist last month that nearly all my old dentist’s work last year was done incorrectly and I needed to have it all redone.  I wasn’t sure whether to argue, curse or cry. 

Then she said the dreaded words – “If you don’t have the work done soon you might need another root canal.”  After hearing that I couldn’t get an appointment fast enough.

So today was the first day of my “redos.”  I was told to report at 9am and to expect to stay for 1.5 to 2 hours. I did as I was told and at 9am I walked into the office and into dead silence. I was there before the doctor even arrived! Am I the only timely person left in Los Angeles? 

When life gives you lemons make lemonade, right?  I figured today was a great time to catch up on all my reading.  So, as I listened to the sound of crickets chirping I caught up with Kirsten Dunst.

Sorry Kirsten but I am REALLY tired of hearing about how your first kiss was with Brad Pitt. 

At 9:20 I was excited to see the doctor had finally arrived and I was led to a room.  My excitement was a bit premature because the doctor was obviously enjoying some coffee and catching up on her blogs because she was nowhere to be found.  I finished Allure and started my own catching up – on Elin and Tiger’s sad little drama.

Am I the only person who didn’t know her name was pronounced E-Lynne?  E-Lynne you are beautiful and can do much better than a cheater like Tiger. 

I almost jumped for joy when the doctor finally made an entrance and shot me up with Novocaine.  By this time it was 10:00.  She told me she’d be back in 5-10 minutes, when the drugs had a chance to sink in.  Stupid me, I believed her.

Nearly 30 minutes later I found myself hunting down a dental assistant to ask where the doctor was.  She said that I needed to be patient because there were two other patients and only one doctor.  Yes, but I was here first I told her.  Even before the doctor I told her.  I don’t think she cared.

I was learning more about Taylor Swift than I ever wanted to know when the doctor finally came back. 

And so did the horrible memories of my root canal.  The pain was unbearable.  The doctor had been gone SO long that the Novocaine had worn off.  So we took a short break to shoot me up again and then proceeded with drilling.  By this time it was 11am.  She worked on one side and then said she’d be back in a few.  I didn’t believe a word she said but I sunk my doubts into another issue of People.

After reading about Demi being hotter than ever at 47, I had to track the doctor down again and explain that I needed to be somewhere at noon.  Could we get the show on the road, I asked her?  So we settled in again with yes, more shots of Novocaine. 

I finally left the office at 12:15 with about 20 holes in my gums, 2 temporary crowns, a lot of useless tabloid information, and with strict instructions not to eat anything crunchy.  I could/can barely open my mouth so I didn’t/don’t think this will be an issue.  I have to go back in 2 weeks for the permanent crowns.  Guess what happens in exactly 2 weeks?

We’ll just call my 9am appointment an early start on New Year’s Eve.  I can’t wait!

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. December 18, 2009 9:09 am

    The dentist is NOT fun 🙂

    Well, the dentists can be, but going sure isn’t!!

    Hubby did some work on me on Tuesday… just a few cavities, but I surely don’t enjoy it.
    Your account of an office visit is pretty accurate–I couldn’t help but bust out laughing here or there 🙂

  2. December 18, 2009 10:51 am

    Hi,
    Thanks so much for the comment on my blog. It lead me to yours 🙂
    You have a fantastic blog here, and you work for the History channel?
    Can I have your life ? 🙂
    I would like to read more of your blog as well, maybe we can add eachother to blogrolls?
    Mine is boring I will warn (very up and down considering I am in a long journey/rough patch in life…but I appreciate readers and commenters. I sometimes wonder why anyone reads at all 🙂

    • December 19, 2009 7:25 am

      I think your blog is great, don’t be so hard on yourself. I would love to exchange links once I get a blogroll going.

      Thanks so much for your comment!

  3. December 18, 2009 2:43 pm

    Lord, I’ve had only one root canal and I wanted to die. Honestly, the pain of fixing it was NOTHING in comparison to the pain I felt before I ran into a random not on my plan dentist’s office for the emergency root canal I didn’t realize I needed.

    Good luck-it’ll be over soon.

  4. December 19, 2009 8:26 am

    Oh me oh my! You poor thing!!! I can’t even begin to imagine how painful AND FRUSTRATING your day was!! Glad it’s over, for now!!

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