Are you also afflicted by Running Commentary?
Example : A husband leaves his plate in the spotlessly clean kitchen after dinner.
- A Normal Person’s Reaction : I’ll just put this last dish in the dishwasher before I sit down.
- A Person Suffering from Running Commentary : Well allow me. No, really. I’m not tired at all! But thank you for being concerned. I mean, despite the kitchen being spotless, I’ll just put this plate in the dishwasher too. Because while I’ve cleaned the kitchen three times already today, it’s really NO problem to move your plate. Really.
Example : An 8-year-old asks one too many ridiculous questions including (but not limited to), “Mama…which socks should I wear today?”
- A Normal Person’s Reaction : “Just wear the pink ones.”
- A Person Suffering from Running Commentary : She has at least 40 pairs of socks in her drawer. No joke. 40. Pairs. Of. Socks. How hard is it to choose a pair? I mean, is the day going to go any differently if she picks white over pink? I wish I had the same problem. I literally have 2 pairs of socks and one has a hole. Note to self: Must stop buying socks at Target.
Example : A family of four obliviously walking their dog (all in a row) on Columbus.
- A Normal Person’s Reaction : Hmmm. I wonder why they are walking so slowly? They must be on vacation.
- A Person Suffering from Running Commentary : Maybe I can get around them on the left. No, that didn’t work. Maybe the right? Nope! So confused. Do they not see all of these people trying to get around them? Are they immune to the glares as people pass by? How can they walk four in a row on a busy street like Columbus? I mean it’s not like it’s Sunday. Not that Sunday is an excuse either!
Treatment for Running Commentary : A cure has not been identified for this genetic disorder. Treatment is also limited. Experts suggest that those afflicted take deep breaths and try to ignore. And when all else fails, seek the help of a professional.
(Which I obviously need to do…)