A Lesson On Interrupting
I decided to teach my daughter a lesson yesterday.
Yes, I know she is only 5. Yes, I know I shouldn’t expect miracles from a 5-year-old. But the truth is that my parents expected nothing less of me, and clearly I’ve learned nothing from their mistakes.
So yesterday I carted Maya around to school, to the library, and to swimming lessons. I made her breakfast, lunch, dinner, and several snacks. We baked a rather terrible Applesauce Cake. I gave her a bath, I read her a bunch of books, and I quelled my sarcastic reply when she said, “My underwear is confusing me.”
And just for the record, if I don’t deserve a Mother of the Year for that last one, I don’t know who does.
But despite having my undivided attention for a solid 5 hours, Maya still insisted on interrupting the one 5 minute phone call I managed to fit in all day long.
So what did I do? Well I did what any other loving mother would do - I told her to go away so my mom and I could continue to explore my anger at the ridiculous street closures Barack Obama’s visit caused earlier this week.
What can I say? Talking to Mom is cheaper than paying a shrink.
After exhausting both my mom and the topic of street closures, I decided to turn on the TV so Maya could enjoy her 30-minutes of allotted TV time. Or so she thought! As soon as she was all comfy on the couch I sneaked up behind her and proceeded to pepper her with loud questions for the next 5 minutes.
“Stop it Mama! Stop bothering me!”
Ali heard all the commotion and decided to join in on the fun. Because that is how a dysfunctional family like ours “bonds.”
“Go away Dad, I’m watching TV.”
We kept up the fun for a bit longer until both Ali and I realized we were missing out on precious computer time. “Okay Maya, I’m going to leave you alone now,” I said sternly, “but I hope you’ve learned your lesson.”
I walked back to my computer feeling rather proud of myself and called up a friend to tell her about my progressive parenting tactics. I was so busy patting myself on the back that before I knew it half an hour went by, Imagination Movers ended, and Maya suddenly appeared to interrupt my phone call with a very pressing matter, “What do I do if I’m still hungry Mama?”
I might need to call my mom back for another session.